poisonbitterswt (4:08:28 PM): (something with the new/new one? the one with them in australia)
x cutoutkid (4:19:48 PM): [sureeee...cow ummm... -think- maybe more caiden trying to get nix to fuck him haha]
poisonbitterswt (4:29:10 PM): (hahahah do what you wish, my dear)
x cutoutkid (4:32:17 PM): -is sitting on the couch, legs pulled up and reading something-
poisonbitterswt (4:34:03 PM): -comes in from the art shop, paint smeared on my clothing and flecks in my hair, dropping my bag on the table and going to get a drink-
x cutoutkid (4:36:51 PM): -glances up at you for a moment and doesnt say anything, gerard is asleep next to me and the tv is on-
poisonbitterswt (4:58:25 PM): -gets out a bottle of water and heads down the hall, tugging off my shirt as i go and heading to my art studio-
x cutoutkid (5:04:49 PM): -slides away from gerard, walking towards the back of the house. my mind is foggy with the shit i was doing before you came home. cough coke cough.-
poisonbitterswt (5:16:17 PM): -is sitting at the easel, pallette spread out beside me and only in paint-splattered pants-
x cutoutkid (5:16:48 PM): -watchs you from the doorway, feeling my throat constrict just watching you-
poisonbitterswt (5:23:17 PM): -strokes a brush across the canvas, listening to coldplay on the cd player on my other side-
x cutoutkid (5:37:30 PM): -walks up behind you, tentatively touching your shoulders-
poisonbitterswt (5:39:12 PM): -the brush stops on the paper- what do you want, cai? -asks without looking at you-
x cutoutkid (5:40:44 PM): -reachs down and lightly takes the brush from you-
poisonbitterswt (5:41:14 PM): -sighs and turns to face you- i was painting, you know
x cutoutkid (5:43:49 PM): -drops the brush- and now you're not.
poisonbitterswt (5:45:07 PM): -arches a brow- why did you come in here and bother me?
x cutoutkid (5:45:38 PM): so now i'm bothering you?
poisonbitterswt (5:52:16 PM): -sighs- i just thought you were fine out there with your boyfriend, so i could come in here and paint for a bit...then you come in and snatch away my paintbrush for who knows what reason
x cutoutkid (5:52:49 PM): my boyfriend? -laughs at that-
poisonbitterswt (5:58:06 PM): -shrugs- what do i know? we never talk -leans down and picks up the paintbrush-
x cutoutkid (5:58:46 PM): well i'm trying to talk right now but you don't give a shit. -walks to the door-
poisonbitterswt (6:07:06 PM): -sighs in frustration- i never said i didn't care, caiden
x cutoutkid (6:10:34 PM): then why are you getting so pissed off at me for coming to see you?
poisonbitterswt (6:11:23 PM): im not...im just..stressed out....a long day....sorry...really..-gives you an apologetic smile-
x cutoutkid (6:13:47 PM): -walks back over, arms around my waist-
x cutoutkid (6:15:54 PM): he's not my boyfriend. -quietly-
poisonbitterswt (6:55:06 PM): -nods a bit- sorry for assuming, all right?
x cutoutkid (6:59:26 PM): -nods a little, sniffing and rubbing my nose-
poisonbitterswt (7:06:02 PM): -arches a brow, but says nothing- so..what was it you wanted to talk about?
x cutoutkid (7:06:40 PM): forget it. i dont even remember.
poisonbitterswt (7:13:08 PM): -frowns a bit, reaching out and touching your arm- you can talk to me, cai...
x cutoutkid (7:14:45 PM): -moves over to you, standing so im looking right into your eyes, my nose almost touching yours-
poisonbitterswt (7:15:19 PM): -stares right back, hands at your sides now- guess you're not really here for the talking
x cutoutkid (7:17:18 PM): -shakes head a little- i dont do a lot of talking lately, if you hadn't noticed... -presses against you, our stomachs touching-
poisonbitterswt (7:20:33 PM): -eyes burn intensely as hands slide to your lower back- no...neither do i
x cutoutkid (7:21:11 PM): its mostly fucking, snorting, and working... -eyes dark, grinding against you slowly-
x cutoutkid (7:24:56 PM): i have a feeling its not the same for you...- tilts head a little-
x cutoutkid (7:25:03 PM): -curious look on features-
poisonbitterswt (7:25:47 PM): -quirks a brow- replace the snorting with drinking and you've got me...-thumbs over your hipbones-
x cutoutkid (7:31:11 PM): -laughs a little, breath going across your lips-
poisonbitterswt (7:32:01 PM): -doesn't have any idea why im letting myself do this, but i can't help it--slides fingers over your lower stomach-
x cutoutkid (7:33:46 PM): -smirks at this- going to take me up on that offer? -brushes lips to yours, not kissing you yet-
poisonbitterswt (7:34:44 PM): today...i just don't feel like taking the effort to refuse you
x cutoutkid (7:35:18 PM): [so is this like not happening cuz we know they dont fuck until the one time...]
poisonbitterswt (7:40:35 PM): (hahhahah whatever you wish...who says they actually fuck in this one? maybe it's other stuff)
x cutoutkid (7:40:42 PM): [nod]
x cutoutkid (7:41:04 PM): good to know... -parts lips against your jawline, kissing wetly there-
poisonbitterswt (7:44:38 PM): -tilts head to the side, eyes open and watching you as i slide hands down your sides-
x cutoutkid (7:45:12 PM): -grabs one of your hands, sliding your palm over my groin hard and moaning softly-
poisonbitterswt (7:51:51 PM): -licks over my lip, feeling your hardon and my own stomach tightening-
x cutoutkid (7:53:24 PM): -my fingers lace between yours a little as i continue to rub myself with your hand, my lips moving beneath your ear as i groan-
poisonbitterswt (7:57:33 PM): -sucks lower lip into my mouth, groping you hard and pulling upward-
x cutoutkid (7:59:10 PM): -slides hand up your arm- mm...right there, phoenix... -presses into your hand0
x cutoutkid (9:01:08 PM): -slides hand up your arm- mm...right there, phoenix... -presses into your hand-
poisonbitterswt (9:03:02 PM): -grips you through your boxers and rubs hard, pressing lips to your neck-
x cutoutkid (9:07:21 PM): -lets out a moany breath, my nerves on end as i grind against your hand-
poisonbitterswt (9:08:09 PM): -slips hand beneath your boxers and touches your bare flesh, pulling you closer with my other hand-
x cutoutkid (9:10:02 PM): -whimpers, my hand sliding down to your ass and grabbing it-
poisonbitterswt (9:13:27 PM): -smirks, jerking your cock slowly, teasingly-
x cutoutkid (9:15:44 PM): -sneaks hands into the back of your pants, gazing up at you with dark eyes-
poisonbitterswt (9:17:26 PM): -stares into your eyes and smirk widens, jerking up on you harder-
x cutoutkid (9:19:22 PM): -both lust and worry suddenly flash through my eyes, averting them to the floor, forehead to your chest as my breath hitchs-
poisonbitterswt (9:23:35 PM): -jaw clenches a bit as i increase tempo, thumbing over the tip--this was what you'd wanted and here i was giving it to you-
x cutoutkid (9:26:16 PM): -grips your hips, faltering a little-
poisonbitterswt (9:27:12 PM): -angry all of a sudden at myself for giving in, but continues jerking hard, bending my wrist-
x cutoutkid (9:27:47 PM): -groans, my lips brushing against the side of your neck and then kissing there lightly-
poisonbitterswt (9:31:39 PM): -steels self a bit at the feel of your lips, not letting emotion come into play--im just getting you off, that's it-
x cutoutkid (9:32:39 PM): -nuzzles lips into the crook of yur neck, my back arching and my hair brushing your cheek-
poisonbitterswt (9:34:40 PM): -closes eyes, making myself breathe normally and presses thumb down onto the tip of your cock-
x cutoutkid (9:35:20 PM): -cums automatically, like a finger pressing a button- phoenix... -moans breathily-
poisonbitterswt (9:42:26 PM): -tries to tune out you saying my name and pulls hand out of your boxers, wiping it on my dirtied pants-
x cutoutkid (9:42:55 PM): -swallows when i feel you pull your hand back-
poisonbitterswt (9:45:19 PM): guess that was better than a talk -mutters, turning back around and getting the paintbrush again-
x cutoutkid (9:52:28 PM): -glares at you, coming up behind you and sliding hand between your legs- dont pretend you didnt want it, phoenix.
poisonbitterswt (9:53:09 PM): -smirks- so what if i did...?
x cutoutkid (9:53:56 PM): -rubs you through the material of your pants-
poisonbitterswt (9:54:51 PM): -starts to paint again, eyes trained on the canvas-
x cutoutkid (9:55:34 PM): -annoyed look crosses features, kneeling down in front of you and undoing your pants, pushing them down-
poisonbitterswt (9:59:51 PM): -barely gazes at you, shaking head and dabbing brush in another color-
x cutoutkid (10:00:19 PM): -has an annoyed look on features as i stand up and shove you hard across the room, leaving the room-
poisonbitterswt (10:09:05 PM): -clenches jaw and hollers after you- the day i become just another fuckbuddy of yours is the day hell freezes over, caiden stofliars!
x cutoutkid (10:11:32 PM): -gerard is there, looking confused, and i grab hi arm and drag him into my room. i slam him against a wall and kissing firecly, ends up fucking him hard and well into the night, all the time thinking again and again that i knew if i could be with you just once... i would push everything else away and be with you. that was my way of telling you i wanted you. i didnt know any other way that seemed easy-
x cutoutkid (10:12:33 PM): [talk about grammatical eeks]
poisonbitterswt (10:13:58 PM): -couldn't pretend i didn't hear you, but i didn't care--i wasn't your fucktoy. i wasn't chuck or gerard. i was me. and to hell with being under your control. that was not gonna be who i turned into. no fucking way. i went to devin's house and forgot about you for one night of my life. let you just fall out of my head-
x cutoutkid (10:16:07 PM): -that was the night i screamed your name... the night he left and said i was fucked up. you name fell so easily past my lips as he hit my spot that it felt so familiar... like i'd been doing it all along. after that i knew the only way to tell you i loved you was to say the words... and after all i'd put you through, I wasnt sure i could do it anymore-
poisonbitterswt (10:19:31 PM): -this was the guy i was going to marry. i wasn't letting anything with you get in the way. you didn't want me the way i'd always wanted you, and i let myself deal with that.-
x cutoutkid (10:21:33 PM): -every night after that when you brought him home, i could hear his name on your lips... and i wanted to come in there... i wanted to tell you it was my name, not his... you should of been saying my name like that-
poisonbitterswt (10:23:16 PM): -he was perfect, ya know. he cared. he was there. he told me those things i longed to hear from you but never would. the wedding preparations were going along nicely. yet i knew inside i'd always picture it as you being the one i married. the one i spent my life with-
x cutoutkid (10:24:58 PM): it wasnt much longer until i heard the words "married", "husband", and "wedding" exchanged between the two of you as I sat in my room. for days after that I walked with my head down, waiting to catch a glimpse of the ring on your finger... and then suddenly, there it was; something id never of been able to give you...
x cutoutkid (10:26:30 PM): it shined at me, mocking me... 'he could of been yours, caiden'... and i walked out the door that morning, shutting it as a first tear fell. i got into my piece of shit car and drove off, not bothering to go into work just yet.
poisonbitterswt (10:28:38 PM): -there was the whole day. spending it with his parents. going over those details. giving him that tender kiss before he left. then coming home. looking around...and feeling something out of place. something that hurt..and as i painted that damn portrait, your face on the page instead of his...it all came crashing down. i could fake it. i could pretend. but it was always you. it was only you.-
x cutoutkid (10:29:45 PM): i came home that night... jobless... heartless... and practically homeless if I didn't watch myself. well. it didnt matter, did it? because you and him would go off and be perfect and I'd be alone again.
x cutoutkid (10:32:08 PM): i sank down into the bed and cried harder than i had the first time chuck lashed out at me... harder than the first time he hurt me... i didnt know what to say to you or if i could say anything.
poisonbitterswt (10:34:08 PM): -and i broke it off. at least in my heart. i was done. devin wasn't it. he never could be it. and i came to your room to tell you that-
poisonbitterswt (10:34:17 PM): (and enter confessions :-D)