Caiden (5:20:03 PM): -three days later out of ICU, its nighttime-

Caiden (12:50:31 AM): [mrww]
Phoenix (12:50:42 AM): (pets you...nice kitty)
Angelina: *stands outside the house Phoenix now lives in, grinding her teeth as she walks up the path to the front door, determination set in her features when she rings the bell*
Caiden (1:02:21 AM): -is sitting on the couch, legs curled up and talking on my laptop when the bell rings. sets it down and goes to the front door, opening it. eyes grow a little wide- what...are you doing here?
Angelina: *smiles wickedly* oh, I’m here to see you, Caiden...
Caiden (1:06:25 AM): Me? what would you want with me?
Caiden (1:06:34 AM): -leaning against the doorframe a little-
Angelina: *smile turns into a sneer* to talk to you, of course...
Caiden (1:07:19 AM): why would i want to talk with you?
Angelina: I never said you had to talk...in fact I dont give a damn if you do or not...I'm the one that will be talking, Caiden...and I think you'd do best to listen...
Caiden (1:09:24 AM): -narrows my eyes at her a little- TALK then.
Angelina: *licks over lips* oh, dont get an attitude now, Caiden...if anyone should have an attitude, it should be me...*fingers something in pocket, eyes glinting furiously*
Caiden (1:11:51 AM): -gives her a look of disgust, waiting for whatever bullshit shes going to say-
Angelina: *near the edge and the look on Caiden's face pushing her closer to the breaking point* You think you're life is so perfect now, Caiden? you think everything's in place...with your beautiful husband...your precious home....well.....what would you do if i told you that Nix didn't even want this....
Caiden (1:18:11 AM): what if i told you that he did...-clenching my jaw- and that i know him better than you think you do
Caiden (1:20:09 AM): you think knowing him for as long as you have really gives you insight to what Phoenix reallyis?
Caiden (1:20:51 AM): WHO he is?
Angelina: *smiles again-leaning forward* he's a man who wanted to die to get away from you
Caiden (1:25:12 AM): -shakes my head- you really don't know him at all.
Caiden (1:25:30 AM): what he did was an action he took without all the facts.
Caiden (1:30:13 AM): and we dont need you coming around with some bullshit story about some kid
Caiden (1:30:24 AM): [O:-)]
Caiden (1:37:24 AM): -shakes my head, getting more and more pissed off at those words- what he did happened because he couldnt be with me of..not because he wanted away
Angelina: *shakes head back and forth slowly* is that what you actually believe? *laughs hysterically*
Caiden (1:41:05 AM): its not what i believe...it's what i know
Angelina: oh Caiden.....you are blind....and stupid....and more naive than anyone i've ever met...
Caiden (1:42:12 AM): wow, you really are the bitch Nix potrayed you as
Caiden (1:44:29 AM): -look of disgust still in place-
Angelina: *shoves you backward, hard* you have no idea, you little faggot...
Caiden (1:47:08 AM): what the hell is your problem? -steps back up, glaring-
Angelina: my problem....is you...and i know exactly how to solve that problem too....*reaches hand to pocket again, eyes glimmering manically*
Caiden (1:49:43 AM): maybe you should leave.
Angelina: oh no, Caiden...it's gone too far for me to leave now...*slowly retracts hand from pocket, gun held steady, pointing at you- smiling evilly*
Angelina: -swallows and steps back just a little- what.... what are you doing... -is scared now-
Angelina: I’m solving my problem.....*cocks the gun, aiming at your chest* you really shouldn't have pushed me....all i came for was a chat....and you opened your big...mouth....*lips curl into a sneer*
Caiden (1:53:06 AM): i...i'm sorry...-afraid to say anything, not sure what i can say to stop this-
Phoenix (1:59:05 AM): Sorry? Sorry?! aww...he says he's sorry....*starts to laugh uncontrollably, gun still pointed at you* it's too late for sorries, Caiden...too. fucking.late....*eyebrows raise as eyes go ice cold and deadened of emotion*
Caiden (1:59:52 AM): -backs up just a little more,so scared i could piss my pants and hearing nox bark in the backyard-
Angelina: do you think he'll try to slit his wrists again when he finds you dead...your blood everywhere....think it will kill him inside...because i do...i think it will rip him apart....make him go insane....*laughs again, t his time bitterly- stepping forward, closer to you* are you afraid, Caiden? *smiles almost insanely*
Caiden (2:05:54 AM): -feels my heart beating in my chest, the only two things running through my head are Phoenix and fear that I’m going to die- i...please...
Angelina: please?! are you begging me? *giggles* aww...that's so precious....are you thinking of him, hmm?
Caiden (2:07:54 AM): whatever it is... we can figure something out... -swallows thickly-
Angelina: whatever 'what' is, Caiden? *smirking*
Caiden (2:09:43 AM): i dont...i dont know...just...please...-searching your eyes frantically-
Angelina: you're pathetic....you cant even face death like a man.....you really are his little bitch...his little fag.....*sneers-placing finger on the trigger* there is nothing to figure out...you die....he comes home...and he dies too....maybe he'll do it right this time....and you can be fucking romeo and juliet.....a perfect little ending for two fairy fags....
Caiden (2:13:13 AM): fuck. you. -spits this out-
Caiden (2:14:08 AM): you're only doing this because Phoenix never wanted you... not the way he wanted me.
Angelina: *eyes narrow* fuck me? not even on your best day....and no....im doing this because the world is better off without you in it *pulls trigger*
Caiden (2:18:31 AM): -makes a noise of shock, the bullet hitting me in the chest as a searing pain tears through me and i fall down to the carpet, blood soaking through my shirt and the carpet below-
Angelina: *steps up to you, kneeling at your side, lips close to your ear* it doesn't matter now who he chose, does it, Caiden? because in the end....everyone's blood flows red...*smiles at you, patting your cheek before getting to feet and stepping towards the front door, pocketing the gun again- looks back once* i wish i could be here to see the look on his face....oh well...*blows you a kiss before leaving the house, humming to self*
Caiden (2:24:00 AM): -tears in my eyes, paralyzed in shock, my eyes closed as i try to breathe, not moving-
Caiden (2:28:01 AM): -feels lik I’m spinning, my thoughts scattered as i gasp for air-
Phoenix (2:34:29 AM): *is on my way home now early because Levi told me to get my ass home for some reason...am extremely happy as i stroke the stray kitten i'd found, hoping you like her, pulls up into the driveway, singing to myself as i scoop the kitten up into my arms and make my way to the front door, jingling keys*
Caiden (2:32:05 AM): -is half concious, hearing the faint noise of your keys, hasnt moved from the spotat all...afraid to move-
Phoenix (2:34:29 AM): *quirks an eyebrow when i notice the door isn't locked, thinking you probably just forgot to lock it again, and pushes the door open, taking a few steps inside and dropping the kitten when my eyes land on you* CAI! *falls down beside you, hands going instantly to the wound in your chest* oh god...what happened? *eyes frantic*
Caiden (2:35:30 AM): -opens my mouth, croaking out- n-nix...-my eyes opening just a little, blurred with tears-
Phoenix (2:39:16 AM): Cai...oh god...Cai...hold on, love...just hold on...i'm gonna call for help, all right...*tears are filling my eyes, and there is a lump in my throat as my body trembles while i keep one hand on your chest and fumble for my phone with the other, flipping it open-dialing 911* hello? i need an ambulance right away....my...my husband's been shot....the address is 414 Desrosiers Lane....please hurry! *hangs up phone and replaces my other hand back on your chest* did...oh god...did she do this to you, Cai...?
Caiden (2:40:49 AM): she...nix....hurts..so bad...-closes my eyes again, a shaky breath-
Phoenix (2:44:32 AM): *presses my forehead to yours* don't die on me, Cai...please....please....i can't do this without you...i cant live without you....you are my life...please hold on...
Caiden (2:45:17 AM): -is listening to your voice, but can't find mine, holding onto your words and faintly feeling your forehead to mine as i feel myself fading out-
Phoenix (2:47:36 AM): Cai....*is crying freely, tears pouring down my cheeks, dripping onto you* dont leave me.....please....dont leave me....
Caiden (2:48:45 AM): -can feel myself shaking as i let out a cough, tasting blood on my lips-
Phoenix (2:51:08 AM): *is trying to be strong for you, but knows if you die on me i will have nothing left...nothing at all* Cai...*hears sirens outside* they're here...they're going to save you....they will....they have to....
Caiden (2:52:01 AM): -doesnt hear anything, just muffled noises as i slip out of conciousness-
Phoenix (2:53:05 AM): *looks up as EMTs burst into the house, shaking uncontrollably as i reluctantly back away from you and let them go to work- leans up against the wall, feeling weak, dissolving into tears as i let any inhibitions i had go*
Caiden (2:54:49 AM): -is totally out, a dream consuming me. seeing you and not being able to touch you.-
Phoenix (3:00:16 AM): *watches helplessly as they load you onto a stretcher, wrapping my arms around myself, not even thinking of the blood ive smeared on myself* -one of the EMTs says i can follow in my car and tells me what hospital they're going to-
Caiden (3:01:51 AM): -on stretcher ;-)-
Phoenix (3:02:36 AM): *staggers back out to our car, sliding into driver's seat and speeding up behind the ambulance, heart in throat- gets out my phone again, speedialing Levi* L-Lev....Cai's...Cai's been shot.....they're....they're taking him to the hospital...oh Levi...I dont know if he's gonna make it....I need you....please....
Phoenix (3:02:55 AM): Levi: I will be there as fast i can
Phoenix (3:03:47 AM): *closes phone again and tosses it onto the seat next to me, eyes blurred as i follow the ambulance to the hospital- park haphazardly and stumble into hospital, watching as you are carted off to the OR*
Phoenix (3:04:07 AM): *flops down into a seat, shaking, crying into my hands*
Phoenix (3:05:19 AM): *Levi arrives shortly and sits down next to me, taking me into his arms* it's ok, Nix...he'll be fine...
Caiden (3:06:00 AM): -lalala...being worked on...shouting for you but only in my dream thats slowly turned into a nightmare-
Phoenix (3:07:24 AM): i can't lose him, Levi....i can't...i will die without him...
Phoenix (3:07:50 AM): Levi: you aren't going to lose him, Nix...there's no way...Cai's a fighter....he'll claw his way back to you...i know ti
Phoenix (3:07:53 AM): *it*
Caiden (3:08:43 AM): -opens my eyes with a gasping sound, my eye frantically looking around me at all these people, a white light shinning down into my eyes. cant move-
Caiden (3:09:07 AM): eyes=
Caiden (3:11:25 AM): -hears the doctor mumble something about 'we've got him back' as i breathe shakily into a mask on my nose. he says something about putting me under and i can slowly feel myself falling into a sleep again, my body going numb and the pain lessening-

Caiden (3:15:01 AM): -insert like...3 hours?-
Caiden (3:16:22 AM): doctor: -comes out- Caiden James? -looking for whoever is there for the patient-
Phoenix (3:17:27 AM): *looks up-raising hand-heart already having plummeted into my stomach as i shakily get to my feet*
Caiden (3:18:08 AM): -walks over- Phoenix?
Caiden (3:18:16 AM): doctor**
Phoenix (3:19:22 AM): y-yes...
Caiden (3:21:45 AM): Doctor: -talking quietly- Caiden suffered some internal bleeding... we've stopped that. it was close, i won't lie to you. we lost him for a few moments -stops for a moment- he's stable now, i can allow one visitor for a few moments.
Caiden (3:25:05 AM): Doctor: -looks at Phoenix- follow me please
Phoenix (3:30:27 AM): *follows after the doctor, wringing hands nervously*
Caiden (3:31:07 AM): Doctor: -leads you past the doors to a room, whispering- hes very fragile right now... so please be careful with your words... i
Caiden (3:31:19 AM): Doctor:i'll be back in 15 minutes to check up on him
Phoenix (3:32:23 AM): *nods, heading into the room* Cai...hey, its me, love...*walks slowly up to your bedside*
Caiden (3:33:37 AM): -has just woken up like 10 minutes ago, moves my head just a little and looks up at you- h-hey...nix...
Phoenix (3:34:32 AM): *reaches out and gently touches your cheek* i thought i'd lost you...
Caiden (3:35:32 AM): -smiles faintly, wincing a little bit- guess I’m not that easy to get rid of.
Phoenix (3:36:35 AM): *tries to smile through my tears* i never wanna get rid of you...
Caiden (3:37:22 AM): -reaches my hand slowly out for yours-
Phoenix (3:37:40 AM): Cai...i love you...god...i love you so much...
Phoenix (3:39:35 AM): *bites on lower lip, blinking to try and keep back tears*
Caiden (3:40:28 AM): i know...nix...-closing my eyes a little- i hate...hospital...rooms...
Phoenix (3:42:23 AM): I’m sure..you do...so do i....*leans over and tenderly kisses your forehead* you...the doctor said...you need to rest....you need to get better and i can take you home and make love to your for hours on end...*nods head, trying to smile again*
Caiden (3:43:17 AM): i dont want you...to go...-frowns a little-
Phoenix (3:44:16 AM): i know...but he told me you need to rest now...that's what...you need...and when you wake up, i will be here...i promise...*touches hand to your forehead, giving you a genuine smile now*
Caiden (3:45:14 AM): -nods sleepily, my eyes closing again- you promise?
Phoenix (3:45:56 AM): absolutely...*leans over to kiss your lips softly*
Caiden (3:47:03 AM): -slowly falls back asleep- i love you, Phoenix...
Phoenix (3:48:09 AM): love you too, my heart...*slowly leaves the room, telling Levi he can go, and finding a payphone, dialing a familiar number becauase i need someone to talk to badly, slumping into a chair as the phone rings*
Caiden (3:50:14 AM): -insert chat?-
Phoenix (3:50:36 AM): (hehe...yeah)
Phoenix: hey there, sleepyhead
Caiden: wha' time is it? -hair down in my eyes, my eyes a little squinted-
Benji: *walks into the room, hair a mess a little longer then the last time u saw it, patch switching sides, tired, but determined kinda look, sees u awake and lets out a breath* why'd you have to go and get yourself shot for?
Caiden: b...Benji!? -a little shock in my voice, my eyes growing a little wide when i see you-
Phoenix: *smiles as i look from you to benj* yeah..this kid decided he wanted to tag along...how could i say no?
Benji: *scratches my head a little, and smiles tiredly, walking over to your bed* yeah...nix kinda had me freaking out..
Caiden: -smiles softly- can i at least have a hug? -gestures you over-
Benji: *kinda gets freaked by hospitals and people in hospitals, wipes sweat off on my dickies and moves closer giving you a tight hug, closing my eyes*
Caiden: i missed you, benj...-wraps my arms loosely around you and hugs back-
Phoenix: *sits back in chair, watching the two of you, smile on my face*
Benji: *closes my eyes and tires not to cry at all, hugging you* i missed you too Caid....*swallows a lump in my throat* dont go scaring me like that.
Caiden: i'll try not to...-kisses your cheek before i pull back, wincing just a little- fucker...i hate stitches...
Phoenix: *glances at wrists without thinking, nervous habit- gives you a small, knowing smile*
Benji: *pouts and looks at you, sighs a little* yeah..me too...*swallows* i uh...joel..took a cab to the hotel...to get settled..
Caiden: joel's here too? -smiles a little- how long have you been here...-looks at Benji questioningly-
Benji: *shakes head* we just got here like...30 minutes ago...i came straight from the airport..
Caiden: wow...good timing...-quietly, looking at Nix now-
Phoenix: *shrugs, eyes darkening for a moment* yeah...it is good timing...
Benji: *odd look* huh? *yawns a little, feeling dead on feet*
Caiden: I’m glad you came... i feel like i haven't seen you guys in forever...
Caiden: benj.... maybe you should go to the hotel... -eyebrows knitted together- you look like you could use some sleep./...
Phoenix: *looks out window, clenching and unclenching fists,biting hard on lower lip*
Benji: *shakes head* no..no its alright...i wanted to come and see u...so I’m here. *smiles lazily* i just...first plane ride heh...
Benji: *looks at Nix, then bites lip, looking back at Caid*
Caiden: -smiles a little, reaching out a hand to Nix- can i get a kiss good morning? -a little worried at the look on your face-
Phoenix: *glances at you, eyes cold* yeah....of course *tries to attempt a smile as i lean over to brush my lips against yours-sitting back almost immediately*
Caiden: -swallows and looks at Benji, a look of fear crossing my features-
Phoenix: I’m gonna go for a walk...*gets to feet rigidly, heading for the door*
Benji: *swallows, and is quickly at your heels* why don't you....come with me to get coffee?
Benji: thats..a walk right?
Phoenix: *glances over at you, eyes narrowed* i can walk fine on my own, thanks
Caiden: -silently thanking god for Benji-
Caiden: let him go with you, Nix...
Caiden: he looks like he could use a walk
Phoenix: *looks over my shoulder at you, jaw clenched* i. can walk. without. someone tailing me. *heads out of the room*
Benji: *bites lip and looks back at Caid, smiling very softly, letting you know i'll do my best, following Nix quickly, grabbing his arm* hey..heyhey...calm down...
Phoenix: *yanks my arm out of your grasp* dont. tell me. to calm down *hisses through clenched teeth*
Caiden: -is sitting in my hospital, pissed that there's nothing i can do-
Benji: i can tell you what i damn well please now just calm down and think for once.
Benji: *swallows, trying to talk to you calmly* u dont wanna do anything without thinking Nix..
Phoenix: *glares at you* i am thinking! i am thinking of walking into my home! of finding my husband lying in a pool of his own blood! in a place he was supposed to be safe in! i am thinking that everything good in my life almost ended!
Phoenix: because of some lousy, fucking bitch!
Phoenix: and i am thinking that if i dont find her and kick her ass...then i wont be satisfied
Caiden: [or, yaknow, kill]
Phoenix: (yeah...well...haha)
Benji: *grabs your wrist* and if you were thinking clearly then you'd know that you can't do anything. do you want the cops to find out? do you want to be thrown in some jail? where you know..everything good in your life will be left at
Benji: home sad because you didn't think of the full picture and acted on your temper...again.
Phoenix: *growls, knowing you're right, but my anger not quite sated-even as sadness makes my vision cloud and tears slip over my cheeks again* i almost lost him, benj...i almost watched him die...because that fucking whore couldn't let go..
Phoenix: and if i dont get to at least...punch her...i swear i'll fucking explode!
Benji: *swallows and tightens grip on your wrist, but thumb rubs over your wrist* i..i know but just...do it the right way...get her the right way..not in a way that'll make *you* the bad guy
Phoenix: *eyes light up-whispering* Avery....
Benji: ....Avery?
Benji: *scrunches forehead
Phoenix: *looks at you* her son...her son that she says is mine....a son that she loves dearly....*glint in eyes* i wont have to hit her....
Phoenix: no....i will just take away the one thing she loves most...
Benji: *swallows and bites lip, confused and nods a little* just...just dont do anything that'll get you in trouble...
Phoenix: oh, i wont get in trouble for this, benj....if he's mine, it will kill her to know that i have him while she rots somewhere
Caiden: -is looking out the window, trying not to cry, worrying about you-
Phoenix: thanks, benj....for helping me put things into perspective...
Phoenix: i have a few phone calls to make
Benji: *swallows and nods, not sure i did put things in perspective* promise me u wont..u wont do anything rash alright?
Phoenix: *stares deep into your eyes* i will not do anything rash. but i sure as hell am going to bring that bitch some form of pain...even if it isn't with my fists....so if you'll please let me go...*gazes down at your hand around my wrist
Benji: *swallows and against my better judgement lets go* im...im gonna go..in..there..*motions towards the room* while you use the phone..
Caiden: -wipes at my cheek, arm across my chest-
Phoenix: yeah...you do that....*strides off down the hall, going outside to use my phone*
Benji: *swallows and turns towards Caidens room, walks in and lets out a breath* i..i think he's just making some calls..
Caiden: -sucksin a shaky breath, turning back towards you as you come in, offering barely a smile-
Phoenix: *paces outside the hospital, phone in hand, chewing on lip* hello, i need an address for Angelina Frederick
Benji: *swallows and heart sinks sees your tears and sits in the chair, wiping at them, whispers* your gonna be alright...
Caiden: i...i'm not worried about me...
Benji: i know..thats gonna be alright too..*whispers*
Caiden: what...what did he say?
Benji: h-he was talking crazy shit at first ya know...*bites lip* b-but he said something about...about avery..
Caiden: -a look of worry in my eyes- what...what did he say about avery, Benji?
Benji: *swallows* taking him away...t-trying to have him taken away
Benji: at least from what i gathered...
Benji: thats what i think hes gonna do
Caiden: -looks down and then back at the window- he doesnt...he doesnt evenknow if avery's his... but that... psychopath...
Benji: *sighs softly and nods* I’m so sorry all this happened...*looks at you sadly*
Caiden: s-so am i... -swallows- Phoenix... he didnt need to see that....
Phoenix: thank you....you have a good day too *snaps phone shut, taking keys out of pocket and walking the few steps to my parking space-gets in car and revs engine, one last look at hospital as i squeal out of the space*
Benji: (...i thought he meant take him away LEGALLY.)
Benji: (haha)
Benji: *sighs softly and nods* i dont think anyone needs to see that...*picks at my pants*
Phoenix: (he did)
Phoenix: (ya know...i think they would hear the car thing....wouldnt they?? )
Benji: (ohh..i thought he was like..going to get the kid)
Benji: (uh....i dunno...depending)
Caiden: (sure, if it was near the window)
Caiden: -swallows, hearing the tires-
Phoenix: (just wondering...cuz he wasn't quiet about it...haha)
Benji: *looks at you, slumping in my seat* shit..
Caiden: d...do you think...he would go after her...Benji?
Benji: *swallows and shrugs* h-he looked me in my eyes a-and said he wouldnt...i-i mean i tried to talk him out of it...fuck...
Phoenix: (he does have his cell phone.....not that I’m guaranteeing he'd answer)
Caiden: can you...can you call his phone?
Benji: *swallows and nods* s-sure..i'll be right back..
Benji: *kisses your forehead and gets up, going outside, calling Nix, biting my lip praying he'll answer*
Caiden: -looks down at my hands-
Benji: *sighs and hears ringing* come on Nix...
Phoenix: *hears phone ring and looks at screen* fucking christ...*flips open phone* what benjamin?!
Benji: *bites lip, trying not to scream* where are you going?
Phoenix: nowhere
Benji: ...obviously somewhere. u pealed out of here awfully quick
Caiden: -is feeling increasingly worried. gonna kill Nix for making me worry like this when I’m like fragile as hell-
Benji: (awww poow Caidens frwagile)
Phoenix: i decided i wanted to look at scenery *snaps*
Benji: (fra-gee-lay)
Benji: *sighs* can you fucking NOT be a sarcastic mother fucker for once?
Caiden: -is so on the verge of crying again-
Caiden: -looks out the window and curses myself-
Phoenix: sorry...its a personality quirk
Phoenix: deal with it
Benji: listen you have fucking Caiden worried sick
Benji: what the fuck are u gonna do?
Caiden: -yeah, I’m fucking worried sick-
Phoenix: I’m not going to do anything, Benji
Benji: then where the FUCK are u going?
Phoenix: dont. FUCKING. worry about it! *slams phone shut, tossing it into the seat next to me*
Caiden: -sinks down under the covers, turning on my right side and wincing a little-
Benji: *sighs* SHIT...motherfucker.*closes phone, pissed off*
Caiden: -closes eyes and breaths out heavily, wishing i had some more morphine or whatever shit they were giving me-
Phoenix: *suddenly comes to a stop, only a few blocks away from the hospital, and lays my head on the steering wheel* i cant go over there....i'll kill her if i go over there....*sighes- pulling away from the curb, doing a u-turn and headin
Phoenix: back to the hospital*
Caiden: -wonders whats taking Benji so long-
Benji: *sighs and turns, feeling bad as i walk into the hospital, my plais pants sagging, pulling them up as i walk in the room*
Caiden: -opens my eyes a little, blanke pulled up to chin- what did he say?
Benji: *pouts over and sits* we kinda just went in circles.
Phoenix: *pulls back into a parking space, and makes way into hospital again, stopping outside Cai's room-sees Benji and motions for him-cheeks burning a bit with embarrassment-knowing I’m gonna get an earful*
Caiden: -swallows and looks out the door-
Phoenix: (yer not supposed to see him yet)
Phoenix: (kicks you)
Phoenix: (just Benji!)
Caiden: [ok, he didnt]
Phoenix: (haha)
Benji: *swallows and sees Nix, brushes hair off of Caidens forehead* i'll be right back.
Benji: (even tho he just got back..heh..)
Phoenix: *fidgets in the hall, biting lip*
Caiden: -nods just barely, sighing and thinking about you and where you are-
Benji: *gets up and walks out of the room, glaring as i get out of site* what the fuck is wrong with you? seriously? do you thrive on making bad decisions or something?
Benji: (i was gonna say "thrive on being an asshole" but i thought that was mean..)
Phoenix: (no that woulda been perfect)
Caiden: [Cais always mean to Nix]
Phoenix: (nix would expect that from benj at the moment)
Benji: *gets up and walks out of the room, glaring as i get out of site* what the fuck is wrong with you? seriously? do you thrive on being an asshole or something?
Phoenix: I’m fucking bipolar! of course i do!
Benji: (hah)
Caiden: [he should totally mention Cai falling to pieces in the other room]
Phoenix: its who i am....i act rashly...i say and do stupid fucking things all the damn time....and most of the time i regret it after......and i knew if i went there and...hurt her...id just hurt Cai....
Phoenix: and i....i dont wanna hurt him....
Phoenix: not anymore than he already has been anyway....
Benji: *rolls eyes, shaking my head* yeah well your fucking "bipolar" attitude and the way you HAVE been acting has Caid a fucking wreck.
Caiden: -would be literally in pieces on the bed if he could be-
Phoenix: *slowly meets your eyes, tears spilling over my cheeks* of course....everything i do fucks him up.....everything...even if i never meant for it to....like with her.....fuck benj....*grits teeth, tears coming in torrents*
Phoenix: *looks down, shaking*
Benji: *sighs and shakes head*nix..d-dint cry come on...*bites my lip*
Caiden: -wishes he could hear whats going on, sighing and feeling sleepy-
Phoenix: if i had lost him...i would've had nothing...*voice small* it all just...the world...everything would've just...just stopped...and it never would've started spinning again...and i felt lost...and like every breath i had was stolen..
Phoenix: and i just wanted to hurt her, benj...
Phoenix: so fucking bad....
Phoenix: *tears drip from my eyes to the floor*
Caiden: -wondering where Benji is exactly, but has a feeling he didnt go far-
Benji: *swallows and sighs* Nix...come on...shhh *pulls you into a hug figuring thats all i can do to help right now*
Caiden: -says a little loudly, hoping hes out there- Benji?
Phoenix: *pulls away from you at the sound of Cai's voice-glancing at you as i wipe away my tears*
Phoenix: *lower lip trembling*
Phoenix: s-should i... should i go in..there....?
Caiden: -a little louder- benj...are you out there? -my voice cracking a little, not liking being alone right now-
Phoenix: oh forget it..im going....*pushes open the door to the room and goes in*
Benji: *swallows a little and nods* y-yeah..
Benji: (ooor not)
Phoenix: (haha...sorry)
Phoenix: (scratch that line)
Caiden: -looks up a little and sees you-
Phoenix: hey there.....
Phoenix: heard i worried you...
Caiden: -nods just a little- you...c-came back...
Phoenix: i didn't get very far....i had this voice in the back of my head...*glances over my shoulder at benj*
Phoenix: and it wouldn't go away...
Benji: *standing in the doorway, bites my lip,*
Caiden: tell the voice i said..t-thank you....-quietly-
Phoenix: *smiles-winking at Benji before walking up to your bedside*
Benji: *swallows and nods a little, walking out of the room to go get a cup of coffee and call joel8
Phoenix: (shit! its almost 530....i have to get to bed or i will be dead while shopping with sara....can we finish this next time we're all on??)
Caiden: -peeks at you from my spot, blanket under chin-
Caiden: [i was just gonna say that]
Phoenix: (hahaha)

Phoenix (12:39:29 AM): *smiles softly at you, reaching out to touch your cheek*
Caiden (12:40:50 AM): -smiles sadly, not saying anything-
Phoenix (12:43:52 AM): *lower lip trembles a bit* i don't know what i'd have done if i'd lost you...
Caiden (12:45:24 AM): neither do i...-jokes softly-
Phoenix (12:46:59 AM): *smiles again, wiping at cheeks* I’m sorry, Cai..god, I’m sorry
Caiden (12:52:26 AM): -tries to move a little bit to sit up more, sighing a bit then looking at you-
Phoenix signed off at 1:00:32 AM.

Phoenix (6:28:10 PM): don't strain yourself, Cai....just lay there allright?
Caiden (6:29:00 PM): -huffs a little and flops back, looking down at my lap-
Phoenix (6:35:27 PM): *wipes eyes and touches your hand* you'll be out of here soon
Caiden (6:41:00 PM): -sighs a little bit, turning my palm up at your hand and feeling tears at the corners of my eyes-
Phoenix (6:46:58 PM): *grips your hand tightly in mine and leans over, kissing at your cheek*
Caiden (6:50:41 PM): don't... i just... want to go home...-sniffling-
Phoenix (6:54:25 PM): *sits back and frowns* i wish i could take you now...but i cant
Caiden (6:58:14 PM): if i pull the bloody iv out of my arm and walk out, i fucking can.
Phoenix (7:05:24 PM): Cai...no...you can't do that...
Caiden (7:05:47 PM): i dont want to be in here! -screaming a little-
Phoenix (7:15:19 PM): *cringes a bit and crosses arms over my chest* i know that, Caiden...
Caiden (7:16:05 PM): -starts fidgeting with the tape on my iv-
Phoenix (7:24:48 PM): Caiden....*touches your hand*
Caiden (7:26:58 PM): don't. -hitting your hand away-
Phoenix (7:32:13 PM): *frowns, biting lip hard*
Caiden (7:32:50 PM): -toys with the tape and whimpers when i feel a shock down my arm-
Phoenix (7:39:19 PM): *winces and looks away, not knowing what to do anymore*
Caiden (7:40:26 PM): -makes a frustrated noise and lets it go, looking out the window-
Phoenix (7:50:27 PM): do you...want me to go?
Caiden (7:51:30 PM): -voice choked up- if you want to leave, do it
Phoenix (7:58:51 PM): i never said i wanted to, Cai...
Caiden (7:59:13 PM): thats alright. i can fucking tell.
Phoenix (8:08:22 PM): what in the hell is wrong with you? you're the one pushing me away not the other way around
Caiden (8:09:03 PM): -doesnt say anything, staring down at my forearms-
Phoenix (8:18:50 PM): *sighs and clasps hands* i know a lot of this is my fault...but don't push me away, Caiden
Caiden (8:19:34 PM): -repeats self- i don't want to be here.
Phoenix (8:23:50 PM): *rolls eyes to the ceiling* you got shot, Caiden...you can't just leave a hospital
Caiden (8:25:40 PM): oh, i got shot, did i? so thats what made me feeling like i wad dying, huh?
Phoenix (8:35:01 PM): *clenches jaw* okay....almost dying gives you the right to treat me like shite, i see
Caiden (8:35:44 PM): -shakes head, not looking at you-
Phoenix (8:40:16 PM): *rubs at wedding band, where there is still dried blood*
Caiden (8:43:25 PM): a long time ago i told you i never wanted to go to a fucking hospital again, Phoenix [lets pretend he said that cuz i think he might have]
Phoenix (8:56:13 PM): yeah...well i never intended for you to go back into one, Caiden
Caiden (8:58:49 PM): -breaths in a little shakily, frowning deeper-
Phoenix (9:01:11 PM): *licks over lips* you'll be out as soon as they do all your tests, Cai
Caiden (9:01:55 PM): they have ivs poked through me and tubes up my nose, how soon exactly do you think that'll be?
Phoenix (9:07:00 PM): *frowns again, looking down* sorry...i guess i was trying to be optimistic
Caiden (9:07:38 PM): -clenchs jaw a little-
Phoenix (9:11:58 PM): *runs hands through my hair and stays quiet*
Caiden (9:12:43 PM): I’m going to sleep. -quietly-

Phoenix (12:09:05 AM): *nods a bit* all right...i'll...er...leave you be then
Caiden (12:09:53 AM): -wipes at cheek, palm at my eye and quivers a little, taking in a breath-
Phoenix (12:17:40 AM): *bites lip again as i rise out of my seat*
Caiden (12:19:42 AM): g-go home and clean the carpet...-whispers-
Phoenix (12:22:30 AM): *cringes a bit and feels heart tug* you think it was easy coming home to that?
Caiden (12:25:24 AM): i didn't say anything about how it was...-softly-
Phoenix (12:34:31 AM): right...of course not...you're the only one hurting...
Caiden (12:35:34 AM): -looks at you, eyes welled up with tears and voice choked- i didnt say that!
Phoenix (1:02:12 AM): well it's how you're acting...
Caiden (1:05:13 AM): I’m sorry...a-alright? -shakily wipes eyes again, my body trembling a bit-
Phoenix (1:07:42 AM): i thought i was going to lose you...it was the worst fucking feelin in the world.
Caiden (1:09:37 AM): well i kept thinking about... how id be alone... and everyone else would still be here...
Phoenix (1:21:40 AM): *closes eyes for a moment* well you are still here...
Caiden (1:22:26 AM): i...i don't feel good...-holding one of my handsin the other, fingers trembling a little-
Phoenix (1:31:50 AM): *comes over to you, touching your forehead* you need something.
Caiden (1:36:46 AM): -closes eyes at the soft touch, hands still shaky-
Phoenix (1:46:08 AM): *kisses your forehead* i'll get a nurse
Caiden (1:46:59 AM): -swallows a little bit, a tear trailing down my cheek-

Phoenix (4:42:17 PM): *heads out of the room to get a nuse, telling them to check on you*
Caiden (4:43:58 PM): -starts crying full out, a pain shooting down my back and into my toes-
Phoenix (4:54:01 PM): *comes back in with the nurse and stands there as she goes through a check up, giving you a higher dose of morphine*
Caiden (4:54:49 PM): -is whimpering, burying my face in the pillow-
Phoenix (5:03:55 PM): *she gives me a sad smile before leaving and i come back over to you, touching your hair*
Caiden (5:23:20 PM): -lifts head a little bit, looking at you with dreary eyes-
Phoenix (5:31:04 PM): *kisses your temple* i'll be right here when you wake up, all right?
Caiden (5:32:13 PM): i don't want to be here...-whispers-
Caiden (5:36:45 PM): -voice mournful-
Phoenix (5:39:42 PM): *chews at lip* oh Caid....i know...*sits down next to you, taking your hands in mine*
Caiden (5:41:36 PM): -fingers bend a little against your hands, closing my eyes as more tears fall-
Phoenix (5:42:44 PM): *hangs head a bit and sighs, wanting to do something, anything for you but not knowing what*
Caiden (5:45:19 PM): -fingers still shake a little in yours, slowly not so much... falling into a fitful slepe-
Phoenix (6:03:36 PM): *leans back in seat, crossing arms over chest and watching you for a long time*
Caiden (6:05:15 PM): -snores softly, breathing heavily as i sleep-
Phoenix (6:09:41 PM): *frowns a little and brushes hair back from your cheek, then curls up in the seat and tries to sleep*
Caiden (6:19:35 PM): -groans in sleep, my hand still in yours and tightening-
Phoenix (6:24:26 PM): *sits up a bit and strokes your hand, trying to reassure you*
Caiden (6:33:30 PM): go away..-whimpers-
Phoenix (6:39:11 PM): *sits back and lets go of your hand*
Caiden (6:42:12 PM): i-i didn't... please... don't...-whimpers more, dreaming-
Phoenix (6:43:24 PM): *swallows, heart tugging, reaching over to touch your forehead* Caiden..wake up
Caiden (6:47:00 PM): -whole body jerks and i look up at you, my eyebrows furrowed-
Phoenix (6:56:10 PM): hey...hey...calm down...it's just me...you're fine
Caiden (6:57:29 PM): -reachs up for you-
Phoenix (6:59:58 PM): *touches hands to yours and smiles reassuringly down at you*
Caiden (7:03:10 PM): d-did they say i could go... yet....-stammers-
Phoenix (7:06:43 PM): *bites at lip a little* yeah....you should be able to go this afternoon
Caiden (7:07:37 PM): -smiles just barely-
Phoenix (7:11:53 PM): you're pissed at me s till, aren't you?
Caiden (7:13:01 PM): -shakes head alittle and sighs- is Levi coming today...-quietly-
Phoenix (7:18:35 PM): *furrows brows* why would Levi be coming?
Caiden (7:19:35 PM): -frowns a little- because he's my friend, Phoenix... and i want to see him.-quietly-
Phoenix (7:21:04 PM): oh...well...i'll call him, all right?
Caiden (7:21:31 PM): -nods a little bit-
Phoenix (7:22:59 PM): *heads out of the room and calls Levi, telling him you want to see him, he says he'll be there asap*
Caiden (7:24:05 PM): -plays with the blanket, gripping it when my fingters shake a little-
Phoenix (7:25:46 PM): *comes back in* he'll be here soon...i'm gonna...go home and clean up, all right? so it's ready for you
Caiden (7:27:08 PM): [aawww had to say that, didnt you] -nods a little bit and looks up at you jkust barely-
Phoenix (7:35:04 PM): (yep...you can be tormenting and so can i :-P) *heads out of the room with my bag and makes way out to car to go home*
Caiden (7:36:45 PM): -reachs and clicks the tv on, staring mindlessly at it-
Levi (7:40:49 PM): *shows up at your hospital room, a bit breathless* they made me go to the wrong floor *chuckles*
Caiden (7:42:43 PM): -looks over and sees you, sitting up a little with a small smile-
Levi (7:43:30 PM): *comes into the room and plops down in the seat* so...how you holding up, mate?
Caiden (7:44:33 PM): -laughs a little- I’m not... -quietly-
Levi (7:49:46 PM): *frowns and chews at lip ring* that bad, eh
Caiden (7:50:31 PM): i wanted to ask you a favor..
Levi (7:54:48 PM): *quirks a brow* er..anything...you know that
Caiden (7:55:30 PM): they're releasing me... in an hour... and I don't want to go home..-quietly-
Levi (7:55:47 PM): oh...*nods a bit* right...
Caiden (7:56:06 PM): y-you don't have to... I just... -shakes head a little-
Levi (7:57:50 PM): no...i....you can stay with us, until you're ready to go back
Caiden (8:06:00 PM): are you sure? -quietly-
Levi (8:10:39 PM): *nods* of course...i've been through this before, remember?
Caiden (8:12:20 PM): the getting shot thing? -bitterly, a nurse comes into the room-
Levi (8:15:52 PM): *arches brows* actually. no..i was stabbed *snaps back*
Caiden (8:17:20 PM): i wasn
Caiden (8:17:39 PM): 't... Levi... i know you've been through a lot too, alright...-quietly, the nurse is taking the iv out and i wince-
Levi (8:20:48 PM): *nods a bit* yeah...you could say that
Caiden (8:26:19 PM): which is why I’m asking you... i don't want to go home... i don't want to be around him... righ tnow....-quietly-
Levi (8:28:09 PM): all right, okay? I get it...you can stay for as long as you need
Caiden (8:33:43 PM): o-okay....-unsure now-
Levi (8:34:38 PM): Caiden...you're my friend...I'm here for you...for anything
Caiden (8:42:54 PM): -nods a little bit and looks at the nurse- can i? -i sign some forms and she says I’m free to go-
Levi (8:44:51 PM): *gets up and looks at you a little* you know he's gonna come over, right
Caiden (8:48:57 PM): i know...-quietly, putting legs over the side of the bed-
Levi (8:50:36 PM): *leans against the wall* as long as you realize that
Caiden (8:52:45 PM): -touchs the pile of clothes Phoenix brought me, slowly taking the gown off, in my boxers-
Levi (8:56:15 PM): *looks away and stares out the window*
Caiden (8:59:54 PM): i don't want you to go against Nix, Levi... if you have a problem with it... tell me...- quietly, trying to get my pants o-
Levi (9:01:31 PM): *glances at you and shakes head a bit* when have i ever had a problem going against him...i've harbored you before
Caiden (9:04:25 PM): i wasnt married to him then...-jokes softly-
Levi (9:06:35 PM): *smirks a bit* no...you're right about that one...but i wasn't afraid of him then and I’m not now, so let's go
Caiden (9:07:06 PM): -smiles a little, hair hanging in my eyes and my one arm in a sling as i tug my shoes on-
Levi (9:10:15 PM): *frowns a little* you need help with that?

Caiden (12:47:21 AM): -looks up at you, sighing- yeah...-quietly-
Levi (12:49:12 AM): *comes over and kneels in front of you, slipping your shoes on and lacing them*
Caiden (12:50:11 AM): -watchs you, feeling stupid-
Levi (12:53:54 AM): *looks up at you* don't even think it, Caiden...this is what real friends are for
Caiden (12:56:04 AM): -smiles just a little- i know...-quietly-
Levi (1:00:31 AM): *nods and gets up, dusting off knees and extending hand to you*
Caiden (1:06:56 AM): -takes it tenatively, wincing a little-
Levi (1:10:54 AM): *helps you out of the room slowly, smiling at you encouragingly*
Caiden (1:11:44 AM): -laughs a little- how am i going to wank like this..-jokes-
Caiden (1:12:04 AM): [cuz hes totally gonna have to have therapy for his arm]
Levi (1:18:28 AM): *smirks a bit* guess Nix is gonna have to do it for you when you go back home
Caiden (1:19:11 AM): -doesnt laugh or smile at that, simply walking beside you-
Levi (1:24:32 AM): *bites lip* all right...dumb thing to say...sorry...*heads out to car*
Caiden (1:32:33 AM): -puts my one hand in my pocket, looking around-
Levi (1:33:37 AM): *opens the passenger side door for you before getting in the driver's side*
Caiden (1:38:34 AM): -gives you a small appreciative smile and gets into the car-
Levi (1:42:06 AM): *starts the car and heads toward mine and raine's place*
Caiden (1:44:01 AM): -watchs the scenary-
Levi (1:45:29 AM): *arrives ther eshortly* just bear in mind...raine's got major moodswings
Caiden (1:56:26 AM): i'll just keep my mouth shut.
Levi (1:56:56 AM): *nods a bit* probably good idea *gets out of the car and comes around to open your door*
Caiden (1:57:22 AM): you don't have to do everything for me...-not in a mean tone, just quietly as i get out of the car-
Levi (1:58:47 AM): nope...i know...im just used to it with raine *shrugs, heading up to the door*
Caiden (1:59:03 AM): -follows behing you, quietly-
Levi (2:01:33 AM): *goes up to the flat and opens the door* raine? *calls out, waiting for an answer, but gets none, sees a note on the table saying she's at the gallery* okay then, she's out for now, i guess
Caiden (2:03:41 AM): -smiles just a little bit, sitting down and popping open the bottle of pills they gave me-
Levi (2:04:25 AM): *goes and gets a bottle of water for you and sets it down on the table*
Caiden (2:08:21 AM): thanks...-smiles alittle and opens it-
Levi (2:08:43 AM): *sits down across from you, legs curled up*
Caiden (2:10:08 AM): -just kind of looks at the door for a long moment, drinking the pills down-
Levi (2:11:37 AM): i can't wait for the first set of loud knocks...and the cursing *shakes head a bit*
Caiden (2:13:11 AM): i think he might already know I’m not coming home...
Levi (2:14:31 AM): *frowns slightly* yeah....knowing him...probably
Caiden (2:21:27 AM): it won't stop him from not understanding...-smiles a little-
Levi (2:22:54 AM): *shrugs a bit* in the end he will
Caiden (2:23:29 AM): i know...-quietly, snuggling up to a pillow-
Levi (2:24:04 AM): i can show you to a room....are you tired?
Caiden (2:24:30 AM): -nods just a little bit, looking at you-
Levi (2:25:41 AM): *gets up and heads down the hall, opening the door to the guest room*
Caiden (2:26:13 AM): -follows behind you- I’m always afraid I’m going to roll over on this...-smiles faintly-
Levi (4:37:37 PM): *chuckles a bit* well, we might just have to prop you up with pillows then
Caiden (4:38:10 PM): sounds uncomfortable. -smirks and follows you into the room-
Levi (4:40:38 PM): *shrugs* hey now...at least it won't put you in more pain
Caiden (4:42:51 PM): -smiles a little bit and lazily flops down on the bed-
Levi (4:44:44 PM): *goes and gets more pillows and goes about propping up your arm a little* see? that's better
Caiden (4:46:16 PM): -laughs a little and looks at you- thanks, Lev...
Levi (4:57:15 PM): *nods* of course, Cai...anytime
Caiden (4:57:40 PM): -snuggles against the pillows and sighs, looking out the small window ther-e
Levi (4:59:36 PM): well...if you need anything else, i'll be out there working *heads to the door*
Caiden (5:00:13 PM): -nods just a little bit, closing my eyes-
Levi (5:05:46 PM): *heads out to the livingroom and sets up laptop and papers*
Caiden (5:09:49 PM): -falls asleep, the medication numbing me-
Levi (5:10:59 PM): *messes around with papers as the phone rings, picking it up and getting a slew of cuss words* hi to you too, Nix...
Caiden (5:13:10 PM): -sleeps some more-
Levi (5:14:28 PM): *holds phone away from ear* yeah, yeah...come over and cause a scene! that's what you're good at!
Caiden (5:16:07 PM): -arm slides off the pillow and i groan and wake up when i feel myself turn onto it a little-
Levi (5:24:22 PM): *growls in frustration* HE DOESN'T WANT TO COME HOME!
Caiden (5:24:43 PM): -hears you and touchs forehead, groaning agani in frustration-
Levi (5:27:05 PM): *gets up and comes to the guestroom, holding out phone to you*
Caiden (5:36:39 PM): i...-opens mouth and shuts it again, sighing and taking the phone- yeah?
Levi (5:39:02 PM): "so you couldn't even tell me you were just up and leaving huh?"
Caiden (5:39:53 PM): -looks at Levi, eyes a little pained, not answering right away-
Levi (5:40:28 PM): *swallows and shrugs a little*
Levi (5:40:40 PM): "right...well then...have fun over there..." --hangs up--
Caiden (5:41:13 PM): -cringes a little bit and sets the phone down, clicking it off-
Levi (5:42:56 PM): *sighs* yeah....he has a way with words, doesn't he?
Caiden (5:43:40 PM): -sits up a little bit and looks at you- do you think I’m an idiot
Caiden (5:43:41 PM): ?
Levi (5:58:57 PM): *raises a brow* an idiot? why?
Caiden (6:04:19 PM): for not wanting to go home?-quietly-
Caiden (6:04:33 PM): for wanting to be alone..
Levi (6:07:24 PM): *bites at lip* nah...not an idiot...i wanted the same thing before
Caiden (6:09:18 PM): -nods a little bit- if he calls again... tell him to come over?
Levi (6:09:50 PM): *arches a brow* yeah....okay
Caiden (6:10:29 PM): -chews lip a little bit-
Caiden (6:10:51 PM): is it alright... if i take a shower? [would be hot if Nix showed up mid shower and helped him ll]
Levi (6:15:10 PM): (hehehehe oh yes....)
Levi (6:15:22 PM): of course...like you really have to ask
Caiden (6:15:40 PM): -laughs a little and nods, standing up-
Levi (6:25:41 PM): towel's are in the closet and all that. if you need anything else, just holler
Caiden (6:27:29 PM): ive takena shower here befoe..-quietly, a small frown on my face-
Levi (6:34:30 PM): oh yeah...*chuckles* sorry, I’m scatterbrained
Caiden (6:46:33 PM): -grins- its alright..-giving you a light hug before moving to the hallway-
Levi (6:47:32 PM): *smiles a little and goes back out to the livingroom to work*
Caiden (6:53:17 PM): -shuts the door, setting down the towel on the toilet with a sigh, working my way back out of my clothes-
Levi (7:02:47 PM): *hears the phone again and sighs, picking it up and listening to Nix rant again*
Caiden (7:05:13 PM): -steps into the shower, keeping my right shoulder away from the water-
Levi (7:21:41 PM): he said to come over...*mutters* yeah yeah....okay....bye
Caiden (7:23:39 PM): -sighs, leaning against the tiledwall-
Levi (7:30:09 PM): *soon enough there is the sound of the door opening and Nix comes in scowling at me* he's in the shower... (and change to Nix and Cai's I’m ;-))

Caiden (7:31:28 PM): -closes eyes, letting the water fall down my cheeks-
Phoenix (7:31:53 PM): *heads to the bathroom, opening the door and heading inside*
Caiden (7:32:29 PM): -doesnt notice, letting out a soft whimper when i move my arm-
Phoenix (7:34:11 PM): *takes off clothes and steps into the shower* so....need help with that?
Caiden (7:38:50 PM): -glances up at you, my head against the tiles-
Phoenix (7:39:59 PM): *quirks a brow* looks like it's a bit difficult
Caiden (7:41:33 PM): yeah...-quietly-
Phoenix (7:50:25 PM): *grabs a bar of soap and motions for you to turn around*
Caiden (7:51:39 PM): -slowly turns around, waiting-
Phoenix (7:54:16 PM): *comes up behind you and softly runs the soap over your skin*
Caiden (7:55:02 PM): -sighs, tilting my head against the wall once more-
Phoenix (7:59:52 PM): *runs it slowly down your back, and then over your stomach*
Caiden (8:00:28 PM): -lets head hang a little, smiling-
Phoenix (8:02:15 PM): *washes you off with a cloth, letting the water rain down on us*
Caiden (8:04:50 PM): -reachs my other arm behind me and lightly touchs your side-
Phoenix (8:08:01 PM): *stops washing you as i reach for the shampoo bottle and lather it in your hair*
Caiden (8:08:31 PM): -lets my head fall back a little at your touch-
Phoenix (8:19:11 PM): *scrubs the shampoo in and then dunks your head under the stream of water*
Caiden (8:20:41 PM): -reachs hand up to ring it out-
Caiden (8:20:54 PM): wring-
Phoenix (8:25:10 PM): *steps back again, watching you for a moment*
Caiden (8:33:30 PM): -feels my fingers tremble a little on my one hand, splaying my fingers out and shaking my hand a little-
Phoenix (8:34:15 PM): they tell you about therapy yet? *asks softly*
Caiden (8:35:13 PM): just that i have to do it...-looking at you-
Phoenix (8:36:30 PM): *nods a bit* too bad my cousin's not here...he does that for a living
Caiden (8:38:18 PM): [thats the first thing i thought lmao] -smiles a little- yeah... -reaching over to turn the taps off-
Phoenix (8:40:15 PM): *shrugs and gets out, wrapping a towel around me*
Caiden (8:42:28 PM): -steps out behind you, not saying anything=-
Phoenix (8:45:11 PM): *dries off and puts clothes back on, tossing the towel in the hamper*
Caiden (8:57:03 PM): -sits down on the edge of the tub, ruffling my hair-
Phoenix (8:58:48 PM): well, i'll see you later...wouldn't want to overstay my welcome
Caiden (8:59:40 PM): -looks at you and down at the towel in my lap, fingering the material-
Phoenix (9:02:57 PM): *shakes head a bit* right...bye then *smooths out hair and heads out the door*
Caiden (9:04:28 PM): -wipes tears off my cheeks and swipes hair back- don't..
Phoenix (9:08:37 PM): *stops at the door* why? you don't want to be around me anyway
Caiden (9:09:50 PM): you know i need you... i just... -lowers head my arms stretched out forearms up on my lap-
Phoenix (9:22:02 PM): *glances back at you* yeah, you showed me that really well by checking out and not telling me
Caiden (9:23:07 PM): i panicked...-quietly-
Phoenix (9:28:40 PM): right...*shaking my head again* you're better off here...Levi understands....he's been through it...did the same damn thing to me
Caiden (9:32:00 PM): i don't want to go home... but i want you around..-quietly
Phoenix (9:33:52 PM): *looks at you incredulously, jaw clenching* you're a piece of work, Caiden
Caiden (9:35:51 PM): -looks at you, eyes sad- and whats that supposed to mean?
Phoenix (9:38:17 PM): I’m just supposed to go on as if it's normal that i have to come over here to see you...
Caiden (9:42:07 PM): what do you want me to do...-quietly-
Phoenix (9:42:55 PM): you do whatever's best for you, Caiden...but don't expect me to be all smiles. that's all
Caiden (9:43:20 PM): so you're mad at me?
Phoenix (9:48:32 PM): *snorts* no...im hurt...but that doesn't matter
Caiden (9:49:41 PM): WHY are you hurt, Phoenix?
Phoenix (9:50:38 PM): *glares at you* because you don't trust me enough to take care of you, and yet you still want me around....coming back and forth here, damn you!
Caiden (9:51:02 PM): I JUST DON'T WANT TO GO HOME! -cries out-
Phoenix (9:56:14 PM): right...i got that much...fine...you're here...stay here for all i care *stalks out the door*
Caiden (9:57:21 PM): -tucks the towel around me and walks after you, grabbing your arm0
Phoenix (9:59:51 PM): don't stop me, Caiden....im going home
Caiden (10:01:13 PM): you don't get it...-voice quiet-
Phoenix (10:03:28 PM): *looks at you* i don't huh?
Caiden (10:03:49 PM): if you did you wouldn't make such a big deal out of it
Phoenix (10:12:23 PM): you're scared of being there...but you didn't have to put me in the dark...run off with Levi and let me find out like that...do you have any clue what the first thing that went through my mind was when i saw the empty bed?!
Caiden (10:13:55 PM): i... no...-reluctantly-
Phoenix (10:17:59 PM): yeah...right....you have no fucking clue what i thought! what i felt when my stomach dropped entering that fucking room! but that never entered your mind, because you're the only one going through pain right now. fuck you, Caiden! i thought you'd DIED!
Caiden (10:19:05 PM): -swallows, dropping my hand from your arm and crossing my own s i feel my eyes well up-
Phoenix (10:21:27 PM): *shakes head, blinking back tears* you're not the only one that's ever felt a pain so bad it made you feel like your heart was being ripped from your chest...because i felt that EVERY SECOND I held you in my arms and you were bleeding
Caiden (10:25:07 PM): -nods, sniffing back tears and wiping my cheeks- d-don't talk about that...please...
Phoenix (10:26:37 PM): sure...i'll just blink it from my memory...*shakes head over and over* I’m going now
Caiden (10:27:40 PM): you know what it feels like waking up and realizing you almost died...-quietly-
Phoenix (10:28:32 PM): yeah, i do!
Caiden (10:29:45 PM): a-and did you want to go back where it happened?
Phoenix (10:34:07 PM): *sighs* i had no choice, Caiden...but whatever...i get it, all right! just stay here...but me...i've got to go back, so i'll see you around whenever
Caiden (10:35:02 PM): so you're going to leave and ignore me?

Phoenix (6:38:41 PM): *purses lips together* no....because unlike you, i can't do that
Caiden (6:39:38 PM): -puts my hand up a little and drops it again, a small sound of discontent leaving my lips- leave, then... -voice choked-
Phoenix (6:57:07 PM): *stares at you for a long moment then nods, turning and heading down the hall again*

Auto response from Caiden (6:57:08 PM): Lips for biting...

Caiden (7:12:18 PM): -watchs you leave for a moment and turns to go back and collect my clothes from the bathroom, feeling tears welling up before finally sitting down on the toilet and lowering my head into my hand-=
Phoenix (7:13:59 PM): *leaves the flat, slamming the door shut behind me and heading down to car*
Caiden (7:15:01 PM): -stays like this for awhile, listening to the shower drip and shaking-
Caiden (7:15:09 PM): -wee emo-
Phoenix (7:17:19 PM): (awwwwwww :-( *snuggles*)
Caiden (7:17:51 PM): -goes back to the room after awhile, sinking down into the bed still in a towel-
Phoenix (7:19:03 PM): *goes home and stands there in the doorway, the bloodstain on the carpet still mocking me and my stomach sinking*
Caiden (7:19:32 PM): -falls asleep, kinda feeling rather hateful-
Phoenix (7:26:06 PM): *gets out cleaning supplies and kneels on the carpet, scrubbing at the stain, tears starting to accumulate in my eyes*
Caiden (7:30:23 PM): -has a night full of nightmares, when i wake up in the morning my hand is cramped and in a tight fist-
Phoenix (7:34:35 PM): *sits at the shop the next morning, staring blankly across the way, Levi ignoring me*
Caiden (7:36:42 PM): -comes in, hair down and in my eyes wearing some of Levi's clothes, and looks for him-
Phoenix (7:40:36 PM): *sees you and frowns a bit* hey Lev, your friend's here...*mutters and heads to my office*
Caiden (7:41:01 PM): -glances up a little at you before you do-
Phoenix (7:44:17 PM): *Levi looks to you and offers a small smile*
Caiden (7:45:48 PM): -sits down in a corner chair near um..magazines... and picks one up, curling up in the chair-
Phoenix (7:47:36 PM): *Levi comes over with a cup of coffee and sits across from you* sooo...
Caiden (7:47:58 PM): -glances up a little bit-
Phoenix (7:59:50 PM): *he quirked a brow* any particular reason you came in here?
Caiden (8:00:18 PM): because there's people here i know... and i won't be alone.
Caiden (8:02:05 PM): -looks back down at the magazine-
Phoenix (8:04:47 PM): oh...right...yeah, that's a good reason...*he bit at his lip*
Caiden (8:05:24 PM): what are you really asking me?
Phoenix (8:14:44 PM): nothing...i just was wondering if you'd come in here because you needed something, that's all
Caiden (8:15:35 PM): -shakes head a little bit, staring at the magazine page blankly-
Phoenix (8:19:47 PM): *he sighed* you know...you can go talk to him
Caiden (8:20:04 PM): he doesn't want me to.
Phoenix (8:25:09 PM): *he snorted* Phoenix is a stubborn arse, and you married him, of course he does
Caiden (8:28:16 PM): well maybe i don't want to talk to him. -quietly-
Phoenix (8:29:27 PM): *he nodded* all right then...do what you want...i've got to get back to work *he stood up and went back to the counter*
Caiden (8:37:54 PM): -flips through the magazine again with one hand, the other in my lap-
Phoenix (8:38:33 PM): *comes back out of the office, paperwork in my arms*
Caiden (8:39:07 PM): -finally sets it down and moves to the counter-
Phoenix (8:44:41 PM): *starts signing things and muttering to self*
Caiden (8:45:11 PM): i have an appointment at 4...-quietly-
Phoenix (8:48:08 PM): you need a ride? *asks without looking up*
Caiden (8:50:10 PM): a-actually... i was looking for something more along the lines of moral support...
Phoenix (8:53:21 PM): *glances up at you* all right
Caiden (8:56:02 PM): -nods a little bit, chewing on my lip-
Phoenix (8:58:48 PM): i just have to finish up these papers and send them out, then i can go with you
Caiden (9:00:01 PM): ok...-softly, turning around to go sit down-
Phoenix (9:05:37 PM): *goes t hrough the papers, signing them and everything before gathering them into envelopes and coming over to you* we can go
Caiden (9:06:37 PM): -is half awake and looks up at you, nodding and standing up-
Phoenix (9:08:06 PM): *heads out the door to my car and opens the passenger side for you8
Caiden (9:08:29 PM): -gets in without a word,pulling the door shut-
Phoenix (9:11:02 PM): *goes over to driver's side, getting in and heading to the hospital*
Caiden (9:11:49 PM): [can you be the therapist :D]
Caiden (9:12:05 PM): -toys with the door as i sit there-
Phoenix (9:13:44 PM): (im gonna kick you. lol) so t his how we're gonna be from now on?
Caiden (9:17:12 PM): [lol well kendall does it really well]
Caiden (9:17:29 PM): -shakes head- i just don't have anything to say...-glances at you-
Phoenix (9:18:41 PM): *nods a bit* course not...*pulls up to the hospital* i'll be out here
Caiden (9:19:58 PM): lot of good you'll be out here. -mumbles-
Phoenix (9:24:35 PM): *shrugs* you should've brought Levi
Caiden (9:26:22 PM): -clenchs jaw a little- you should of said you didn't want ot help me and i would have...-slamming the door behind me- [cuz he totally said "for moral support" and not "drive me there"]
Phoenix (9:28:27 PM): (i know that. and Nix is an ass.) *rolls eyes and drives off in a hurry, squealing tires*
Caiden (9:29:24 PM): -walks into the hospital, feeling reluctant and pissed off, going to the floor i was told to and signing in-
Phoenix (9:33:48 PM): *zips in and out of traffic and back to the shop, parking and slamming the shift into gear before getting out, storming back into the shop*
Caiden (9:34:40 PM): -sits down in the chair and waits a few moments before someone calls me in-
Phoenix (9:41:03 PM): *snaps at people as they come up to me, before Levi tells me to go soak my head and i stalk off into the back*
Caiden (9:43:10 PM): -follows some lady down to a room and sits there, waiting-
Phoenix (9:44:53 PM): *a therapist comes in shortly and sits down, asking you questions about the accident and how you're feeling now*
Caiden (9:45:14 PM): horrible...-replies quietly-
Phoenix (9:45:45 PM): *she raises a brow* physically or emotionally
Caiden (9:46:34 PM): both. i can't do anything with my right hand.
Phoenix (9:49:55 PM): *she frowned and started to moves your fingers*
Caiden (9:50:30 PM): -winces a little bit and looks at the wall-
Phoenix (9:51:46 PM): hmmm...well you've got movement in them...are they tingling like they're numb?
Caiden (9:53:59 PM): -shakes head- they just... they cramp up... and my hand shakes sometimes...
Phoenix (9:57:36 PM): *nods a bit* pinched nerve, sounds like
Caiden (9:58:28 PM): yeah, well.. .that was what they told me. i need it fixed.
Phoenix (10:00:24 PM): have to have a few surgeries probably...then therapy a couple times a week. it should be back to normal in a few month's time
Caiden (10:01:15 PM): surgery? they told me i'd just need therapy! -sounding irritated-
Phoenix (10:01:41 PM): *looks up at you* therapy doesn't fix a pinched nerve
Caiden (10:02:35 PM): this is horseshit. -grumbles-
Phoenix (10:07:00 PM): *arches a brow* would you rather go through it or lose all feeling in your hand?
Caiden (10:08:22 PM): [why is it i can see Cai spazing on Nix and yelling at him some more?]
Caiden (10:08:41 PM): -sighs and looks at the floor- looks like i have to go through with it, doesnt it? -quietly-
Phoenix (10:10:55 PM): (because you want to, hahaha) *nods a bit* that'd be my professional opinioon
Caiden (10:11:14 PM): so what do i do right now? if I’m not doing therapy?
Caiden (10:11:30 PM): [because I’m going to asusme the bullet hit a nerve and triggered this?]
Phoenix (10:21:21 PM): (yeah. k. sounds good. lol) you can do daily exercises until the day of the surgery, build up strength
Caiden (10:22:53 PM): -nods- can i go now? -impatiently-
Phoenix (10:23:52 PM): sure...sign yourself out and you're free to go
Caiden (10:24:40 PM): -gets up and hurries out of the room, signing myselfout and flipping myself open for a cab, sitting outside on the curb-
Phoenix (10:28:14 PM): (ummmmm....?? what now?)
Caiden (10:28:41 PM): [you'll see. sorries]
Caiden (10:29:06 PM): -finally the cab gets there and i give directions back to the shop, coming in and looking pissed-
Phoenix (10:31:00 PM): *is in the back room, Levi sees you and swallows hard*
Caiden (10:31:51 PM): -walks past him quickly to the backroom and when i get there, shoves you hard with my food hand against the boxes there-
Caiden (10:33:06 PM): good-
Phoenix (10:39:17 PM): What the bloody fuck is wrong with you?!
Caiden (10:40:15 PM): YOU'RE AN ARSEHOLE, PHOENIX! YOU MADE ME GO IN THERE ALONE!
Phoenix (10:41:51 PM): *rolls eyes* you were too good to talk to me but needed a chauffeur...and because i don't go into the hospital I’m the arsehole?
Caiden (10:43:31 PM): -shoves you into the wall this time- I HAVE A LOT OF SHITE ON MY MIND! I WAS SCARED! I''M STILL FUCKING SCARED!
Phoenix (10:51:17 PM): stop fucking pushing me, Caiden! You've done that well enough! AND YOU AREN'T THE ONLY ONE! I went home last night and scrubbed up blood!
Caiden (10:52:09 PM): and you think leaving me helps? TAKING OFF AND LEAVING ME THERE WHEN I ASKED YOU TO BE THERE, PHOENIX! DO YOU THINK IT HELPS EITHER OF US?
Phoenix (10:55:03 PM): NO! GODDAMMIT! NO! But I’m sick of you acting like you're the only one that's hurting!
Caiden (10:56:37 PM): WELL YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S ACTING LIKE ITS ABOUT YOU! LIKE ITS ALL FUCKING ABOUT YOU! I GET IT! I CAN IMAGINE HOW YOU FEEL, ALRIGHT? BUT KNOCKING ME DOWN EVEN MORE ISN'T HELPING!
Phoenix (10:58:08 PM): *narrows eyes* no...you're wrong...you're the selfish one, Caiden..dont you fucking pin it on me
Caiden (10:58:59 PM): I WILL PIN IT ON YOU! IT'S YOUR FAULT! ALL OF IT'S YOUR FAULT!
Caiden (10:59:43 PM): THATS WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR, ISN'T IT?
Phoenix (11:01:46 PM): *slaps you across the face* FUCK. YOU!
Caiden (11:03:45 PM): -looks at you for a moment- hit me, that will solve EVERYTHING, won't it? just remember that when you don't see me again, you did this to us! you pushed us apart! i wanted you around and you wouldnt! -turns around to leave=
Phoenix (11:05:04 PM): fine! *takes off ring and throws it at you* go fuck yourself then!
Caiden (11:05:36 PM): [insert: hitting me solved everything for everyone else with me]

-ignores that and just flat out storms out of the place past Levi-
Phoenix (11:08:42 PM): *slams shut the door and lets out a bellow of curses*
Caiden (11:10:19 PM): -doesnt bother leaving yet because the taxi is gone and i have no car with me, collapsing on a bench-

Phoenix (12:55:01 AM): *frowns and slides to the floor, hanging head in hands*
Caiden (12:56:38 AM): -looks at my hand, curling my fingers into my palm and leaning my head back agaisnt the bricks, tears sliding down my cheeks-
Phoenix (1:01:23 AM): *bangs head back against the wall repeatedly* fuck...fuck...fuck
Caiden (1:07:13 AM): [and Levis like "errr"? lmao]
Phoenix (1:11:11 AM): (hahah! probably....lol)
Caiden (1:12:29 AM): -swallows, not even able to describe how i feel [cough angelina showing up lmao cough]-
Caiden (1:13:49 AM): [i dunno cuz i was thinking how interesting that would be up to you of course
Phoenix (1:15:35 AM): (O.O...she's on the run, silly)
Caiden (1:15:51 AM): [sniff but it would be so interestingfinnne]
Phoenix (1:17:37 AM): (hello she shot him, loser! why would she come back there?)
Caiden (1:17:52 AM): [well, she shot him. she is nuts. lmao]
Caiden (1:19:13 AM): -wipes cheeks again and sighs, hiccuping a little bit as i look around the street, waiting for something... i dont know=
Phoenix (1:23:19 AM): so you lived, huh...? *her voice was cold*
Caiden (1:23:38 AM): [gasp!you dont have to have her bck but if you want... eeeeh]
Caiden (1:23:41 AM): eeii-
Phoenix (1:25:19 AM): (go with it already, woman!;-))
Caiden (1:25:54 AM): -blinks just a little bit, looking to my right and seeing her, feeling my stomach drop-
Phoenix (1:27:53 AM): *she smirks a bit* guess i didn't aim well enough
Caiden (1:28:12 AM): guess you didn't. -staring at her-
Phoenix (1:31:10 AM): *she laughs* better luck next time *her eyes glint*
Caiden (1:32:00 AM): what exactly is it that you want? to finish me off?
Phoenix (1:36:40 AM): *she laughed harder* maybe so...
Caiden (1:42:48 AM): -moves to stand up and tries to ignore her-
Phoenix (1:44:00 AM): you can't get away, Caiden...one day you'll turn around....and BANG!
Caiden (1:45:06 AM): -just looks at her- if you'd really wanted me dead, you would of made sure of it
Caiden (1:47:34 AM): [and hes totally panicking on he inside-
Phoenix (1:50:55 AM): *she smirked again* oh...i don't m ake mistakes twice
Caiden (1:51:55 AM): -ignores her again and tugs the door open, going inside-
Phoenix (1:53:10 AM): i will get you, Caiden....don't worry....*she says before slipping away*
Caiden (1:54:28 AM): -the moment I’m in there, the door shut, everything i'd felt with her standign there comes out, tears again taking me over and growing into sobs of your name-
Phoenix (1:55:40 AM): *hears you and throws open the back door, coming out and seein you in tears--without even thinking just pulls you into my arms*
Caiden (1:56:46 AM): -buries my face in your chest, not paying attention to anyone around us even though they're all staring at me and you-
Phoenix (1:57:33 AM): Caiden...what's wrong? what happened? *whispers*
Caiden (1:58:18 AM): -shakes head and cries harder-
Phoenix (1:59:42 AM): *frowns and hugs you to me tightly, pressing cheek to your head and just holding onto you*
Caiden (2:01:10 AM): she was outside...-whispers-
Phoenix (2:01:31 AM): *pulls back from you, eyes blazing* what?!
Caiden (2:02:16 AM): s-she was outside...-stammers-
Phoenix (2:05:19 AM): *looks murderous* that fucking cunt...*stalks outside, looking around*
Caiden (2:07:07 AM): -stands there, looking tinier than normal lol-
Phoenix (2:07:35 AM): *she's nowhere to be found and i go back inside* i'll fucking kill her...
Caiden (2:07:54 AM): shes probably gone for now...-quietly-
Caiden (2:08:14 AM): didnt like the fact i was alive..
Phoenix (2:09:01 AM): *scowls* well, she's still breathing and i don't like that fact either...so can i go stalk her?
Caiden (2:09:26 AM): -swallows a little bit and just looks at you-

Phoenix (1:19:08 AM): *seethes angrily, pacing back and forth*
Caiden (1:20:31 AM): P-Phoenix... -standing there, looking at you like a wittle lost puppy-
Phoenix (1:23:15 AM): (awwww...stop that! *slaps hand*) *glances at you, eyes saddening, and comes back over to you*
Caiden (1:23:36 AM): I’m sorry...-cracking a little bit-
Caiden (1:23:47 AM): [like soobb I’m sorry aaahhh]
Phoenix (1:26:46 AM): *bites at lip, closing eyes for a moment, then pulls you tight against me* i am too, Cai...oh god, i am
Caiden (1:28:17 AM): -whimpers a little bit and hugs you the best i can, wishing id remembered the vicodin at Levis-
Phoenix (1:30:31 AM): *presses forehead to the top of your head* come on...i'll take you to Levi's...let you rest
Caiden (1:38:35 AM): -opens mouth and closes it again, just burying my face against your chest and not saying anything-
Phoenix (1:40:30 AM): *leads you out of the shop over to my car*
Caiden (1:42:59 AM): -doesnt want to go, practically clung to you-
Phoenix (1:46:41 AM): *looks down at you* Cai...love...what is it?
Caiden (1:48:18 AM): she really wants to kill me... -quietly-
Phoenix (1:52:16 AM): well....she's fucking insane...and it's not gonna happen...i'd kill her first
Caiden (1:53:13 AM): -digs arms inside your jacket, wrapping myself closer to you [becauseits kinda nippy out lmao]
Phoenix (1:55:01 AM): *strokes over your back, looking down at you sadly* you'll be okay, Caiden...im not gonna let anyone hurt you
Caiden (1:59:21 AM): i want to go home...-whispers-
Phoenix (2:04:18 AM): *eyes soften and i feel tears prickle in them* a-are you sure?
Caiden (2:06:02 AM): -nods a little bit, my head brushing against your chest- i-i have to get some things....-quietly-
Phoenix (2:07:03 AM): of course....let's go...*gives you a little smile and opens the passenger side door*
Caiden (2:07:52 AM): -looks at you a little bit before letting you go, sliding down into the car-
Phoenix (2:10:30 AM): *shuts the door and gets into the driver's seat, starting the car and heading to Levi's*
Caiden (2:10:58 AM): -rubs at my fingers, looking down at my lap-
Phoenix (2:12:48 AM): *pulls up shortly and parks car*
Caiden (2:14:58 AM): -opens the door, quietly, and crawls out-
Phoenix (2:17:00 AM): *leans back in seat, watching you as i chew my lip a little*
Caiden (2:18:48 AM): [can we say Levi brought him the carebear? :D and this can be like 3 days after he left the hospital bauhaha] -goes in and gets painpills, and other things, coming out holding the carebear by its paw-
Phoenix (2:19:43 AM): *smirks a bit* stole my carebear again, huh?
Caiden (2:22:47 AM): -smiles justa little and gets back in, holding it in my lap-
Phoenix (2:23:18 AM): *shakes head with a small grin and drives towards our house*
Caiden (2:25:58 AM): -rubs atmy palm again, watching the scenary-
Phoenix signed off at 2:28:55 AM.

Phoenix (5:36:44 PM): *when i finally get there, i pull into the driveway and turn off the car, glancing over at you silently*
Caiden (5:38:36 PM): -tugs at the bear's ear, rubbing it between my fingers-
Phoenix (5:59:05 PM): *sighs a little and gets out of the car, heading up to unlock the door*
Caiden (6:00:42 PM): -opens the door and carries the bear alongside, pill bottle jiggling in my pocket-
Phoenix (6:03:45 PM): *stands there in the doorway, smiling at you reassuringly*
Caiden (6:08:41 PM): -tucks the bear under my arm and pushes the door open-
Phoenix (6:17:13 PM): *steps in behind you, shutting and locking the door behind me*
Caiden (6:17:52 PM): -reachs over without looking and touches your hair, pulling you along with me through the living room-
Phoenix (6:33:19 PM): *grasps your hand tightly and heads after you without saying a word*
Caiden (6:35:33 PM): -walks over the carpet and past everything without looking, down the hallway to our bedroom-
Phoenix (6:50:46 PM): *steps inside the room i haven't shared with you in over a week*
Caiden (6:52:42 PM): -toes my shoes off and lets your hand go, tugging my shirt off uneasily, stitches showing in my back-
Phoenix (7:01:05 PM): *swallows a little as i shut the bedroom door, looking away*
Caiden (7:03:56 PM): -gets down to my boxers before looking at you a little over my shoulder, sitting down on the bed and pulling a pillow up to me with one hand-
Caiden (7:05:13 PM): i have to go back to the hospital tommorow...-quietly-
Phoenix (7:07:07 PM): *glances at you and nods a little as i kick off my shoes and go about getting on pajamas* when?
Caiden (7:08:24 PM): all day... from 7am till the next day...-quietly-
Phoenix (7:11:43 PM): all right...well i can take you there...but i'll have to leave for a bit..some meeting or another with some business guys. I can come back when it's over and stay with you
Caiden (7:14:10 PM): -looks over at you- more surgery... [cuz we can say he didnt say antyhing]
Phoenix (7:19:54 PM): *quirks a brow* surgery?
Caiden (7:22:35 PM): -holds out arm a little, my right hand curled into an awkward fist-
Phoenix (7:24:11 PM): oh...*chews on lip* i see
Caiden (7:26:40 PM): they lied to me... when they said it would be alright with therapy... they should of fixed it the first time... pinched nerve... -shrugs a little-
Phoenix (7:36:37 PM): *frowns* well...at least it can be fixed at all, ya know?
Caiden (7:37:58 PM): -shakes hea d alittle bit- still won't be the same
Phoenix (7:39:54 PM): *sighs* maybe not right away, Cai...but it can be with time
Caiden (7:42:31 PM): [i totally ganked the hand thing from justin, his hand gets tired after like 15 mins of drawing sniff] maybe...-quietly, looking down at my fingers and flattening my palm out again-
Phoenix (7:49:55 PM): (yeah...i remember that :-\) *comes over to the bed and gets in on my side*
Caiden (7:51:03 PM): -rubs a little at my knuckles, rubbing it out-
Phoenix (7:51:44 PM): *glances over at you and reaches out, touching your shoulder*
Caiden (7:53:33 PM): -looks at you questioningly-
Phoenix (7:56:59 PM): *strokes your shoulder a bit and then leans over, kissing it softly*
Caiden (7:58:12 PM): -sighs a little bit, closing my eyes-
Phoenix (8:03:47 PM): *curls up to you, wrapping an arm around you* good night, Cai
Caiden (8:05:02 PM): i don't want to sleep...-quietly-
Caiden (8:06:14 PM): -touching your arm a little-
Phoenix (8:12:40 PM): *glances down at you and tilts head* then what do you want?
Caiden (8:13:37 PM): i don't know...-softly- i just wanted to be with you...
Phoenix (8:18:16 PM): *smiles a little* well, I’m here...
Caiden (8:19:25 PM): i know...-voice sounding uncharacteristic of me-
Phoenix (8:37:02 PM): *raises a brow*so...?
Caiden (8:39:10 PM): i just... i don't... i don't want to go to sleep... thats all... -wee nightmares-
Phoenix (8:47:58 PM): *nods* well...we can watch a movie or something...keep you awake
Caiden (8:51:49 PM): -reachs up and lightly touchs your cheek- that sounds good...-quietly-
Phoenix (8:58:36 PM): *smiles and gets out of bed, going over to the entertainment system and flipping through things till i get to....er...i have no clue, and pops it in*
Caiden (9:01:21 PM): -sits up a little against the pillows-
Phoenix signed off at 9:03:05 PM.
Phoenix signed on at 10:03:58 PM.
Caiden (10:04:45 PM): -sits up a little against the pillows-
Phoenix (10:08:15 PM): *comes back to bed and puts arms behind my head*
Caiden (10:08:40 PM): -moves over to you, nestling my head against your chest a little-
Phoenix (10:21:01 PM): *wraps one arm down around your shoulder, pulling you close*
Caiden (10:21:38 PM): -rests my hand on your lap, sighing-
Phoenix (10:25:24 PM): *watches you for a minute before the movie starts, then looks to the screen*
Caiden (10:26:47 PM): -cringes a little bit at the loud slam at the beggining of the movie, whatever it is-

Phoenix (1:43:34 AM): *glances to you and rubs your arm a little*
Caiden (1:45:36 AM): -relaxes a little, enjoying that feeling-
Phoenix (1:48:15 AM): *kisses the side of your head and attempts to get into the movie*
Caiden (1:48:53 AM): -eyes f;utter a little bit, moving so my heads more on your stomach-
Phoenix (1:50:47 AM): *strokes fingers through your hair softly, staring blankly at the screen*
Caiden (1:51:25 AM): -eyes close after ten more minutes, falling asleep-
Phoenix (1:52:38 AM): *holds back a laugh when i hear you snore a little and turn off the movie, leaning back and closing my own eyes*
Caiden (1:54:06 AM): -is kinda in that state where you're asleep but you can hear things, hears the sudden silence and my fingers bend against your skin-
Phoenix (1:57:30 AM): *continues stroking your hair and sings softly under my breath*
Caiden (2:00:11 AM): -hears this and feels comforted again, curling more against your side, head falling against your chest now-
Phoenix (2:06:46 AM): *continues singing till i hear your breath even out*
Caiden (2:27:46 AM): -sleeps like this, completly content, before finally rolling off you sometime an hour later-
Phoenix (2:29:46 AM): *curls up now to a pillow and snores lightly*
Caiden (5:27:43 PM): -wakes up with tears on my cheeks, its 3am, and looks around a bit frantically and instantly regrets jerking awake as i feel my arm throb with pain from my shoulder to my hand-
Phoenix (5:28:37 PM): *startles a bit, letting out something muttered*
Caiden (5:30:50 PM): -hisses a litle bit, moving away from you and off the bed, grabbing the pills from earlier out of my jeans pocket on the floor and taking more than needed-
Phoenix (5:32:03 PM): *mumbles and turns back over in bed, curling up under the covers again*
Caiden (5:33:24 PM): -goes out to the kitchen, gtetting a drink and swallowing them down, moves to sit on the couch in the living room and eventually starts staring at the floor, seeing a faint trace of what happened-
Phoenix (5:36:33 PM): *rolls over on other side and no longer feels you, furrowing brows and eyes blinking open(
Caiden (5:37:49 PM): -feeling a light haze from the vicodin finally, standing up and grabbing bleach from under the counter top and a sponge with a rough side. drops to my knees in front of it, pouring a good amount of the bleach on it and starting to scrub hard, furious-
Phoenix (5:39:51 PM): *gets out of bed and pads down the hallway--the overpowering smell of bleach hitting me and crinkling up my nose as i get into the livingroom* Cai...*whispers* Cai, what are you doing?
Caiden (5:47:42 PM): -ignores you, tears on my cheeks still only flowing once again, scrubbing andmuterring-
Phoenix (5:52:05 PM): *comes over and kneels down, taking the sponge from your hand and gripping your wrist* stop, Cai....love, just stop
Caiden (5:52:47 PM): -tries t pull my hand away, bleach dripping from my fingers-
Phoenix (5:59:23 PM): *throws the sponge away and pulls you into me* Cai...it's over...shh...just let it be over, love
Caiden (6:02:27 PM): its not... its still there... -sobs-
Phoenix (6:03:43 PM): *presses forehead to the top of your head and rocks you back and forth*
Caiden (6:04:48 PM): what did i do... why does everyone want to hurt me... why do they want to hurt me...-mumbling, getting the bleach all over your shirt-
Phoenix (6:08:54 PM): *frowns and closes eyes tightly* because they're horrible people, Caiden...that's why
Caiden (6:09:26 PM): -shakes head- its me... it has to be me...
Phoenix (6:11:00 PM): *tips your chin up and makes you look me in the eye* no. don't you dare think that. bad, shitty things happen to good people...look at what's happened to Levi... to me and you...to reese...my parents...we're not bad people, Caiden
Caiden (6:11:48 PM): -closeseyes, blinking tears away and shaking my head-
Phoenix (6:25:25 PM): *pulls you up onto my lap, cradling you in my arms and continuing to rock you*
Caiden (6:38:44 PM): -shakes a little against you, feeling physically numb and overemotional-
Phoenix (6:43:13 PM): *looks over at the clock and sighs* come on...let's get you a shower and get ready for the hospital
Caiden (6:52:57 PM): -doesnt want to go back there, pulling away from you-
Phoenix (6:54:17 PM): *sighs* i know that place sucks, Cai...but it's to make you better
Caiden (6:55:57 PM): "sucks" isnt the word for it..
Phoenix (6:56:42 PM): like i have no idea about how bad hospitals are...but it's only one more day, Caiden
Caiden (6:58:20 PM): for now. -grumbles-
Phoenix (7:00:44 PM): *frown deepens* what's that supposed to mean?
Caiden (7:03:22 PM): I’m sick of going there for other people. sick of overdosing, bleeding to death, being torn apart and shot at... I’m sick of it...
Phoenix (7:11:00 PM): *licks over dried lips and shoulders sag* well what are you going to do, just not go?
Caiden (7:11:46 PM): no i just... things are supposed to get better... i have you... things are supposed to be better
Phoenix (7:17:00 PM): *looks down at hands* i guess i didn't really save you, huh?
Caiden (7:18:03 PM): i-i don'
Caiden (7:18:08 PM): 't know anymore...
Phoenix (7:22:02 PM): *looks to you and face falls* maybe we should just...*bites lip, tears in eyes* maybe we should be apart...
Caiden (7:52:20 PM): -just looks at you- what do you think that will do?
Phoenix (7:54:37 PM): i don't know...give you space to think....i have no clue
Caiden (7:55:08 PM): i've thought enough... what i want is not to think
Phoenix (8:00:43 PM): well that's kinda not possible, Cai...
Caiden (8:04:29 PM): -looks at you, shaking my head and moving past you-
Phoenix (8:11:41 PM): *lets out a heavy breath and just sits there*
Caiden (8:23:34 PM): -goes to the kitchen. staring out the window as i wash my hands-
Phoenix (8:27:43 PM): *glances down at ruined shirt and then at the glaring white spot now on the carpet*
Caiden (8:28:15 PM): -swears a bit loudly when my hand cramps up
Phoenix (8:36:09 PM): *cringes and goes over to pick up the sponge, mopping up some bleach*
Caiden (8:39:10 PM): -ends up throwing the soap bar at the window, my hand gripping the edge of the sink-
Phoenix (8:43:30 PM): *brings the sponge and the bleach back to the bathroom, storing them away*
Caiden (8:43:52 PM): -slides down onto the floor in front of the sink-
Phoenix (8:48:29 PM): *comes back out and goes to the kitchen, frowning down at you* Cai..
Caiden (8:53:32 PM): -shakes head-
Phoenix (8:59:27 PM): fine...*nods and leaves the room*
Caiden (9:01:14 PM): -wipes at cheeks, taking a deep breath and looking around before i finally stand up, walking down the hall-
Phoenix (9:15:26 PM): *sits in study, going over paperwork and rubbing at forehead*
Caiden (9:16:06 PM): -fills up the bathtub, climbing in-
Phoenix (9:20:48 PM): *puts head down on the desk and lets out a frustrated sigh*
Caiden (9:22:42 PM): -sighs and washes hair quietly, trying not to think-
Phoenix (9:27:58 PM): *takes a deep breath, gazing down at my wedding ring--then gets up and heads to bedroom, starting to pack a bag--comes into the bathroom once I’m done* i think we need to separate...for awhile
Caiden (9:30:12 PM): -sits up, looking at you- why?
Phoenix (9:33:33 PM): because this is tearing us in two..and i think...if we have some time apart...maybe it'll help
Caiden (9:34:38 PM): -shakes head, voice coming out choked- whydo you want to get away from me?
Phoenix (9:36:55 PM): it's not like that, Caiden...it's not because of that....it's because i dont want to wake up one morning and have you resent me, all right?
Caiden (9:37:43 PM): what exactly do you think be seperated would help? -looks at you-
Phoenix (9:39:42 PM): us in general, Cai...i just...this is so fucking messed up...
Caiden (9:44:50 PM): -moves to drain the tub, not looking at you-
Phoenix (9:46:31 PM): im...going to stay at my studio...*nods and turns to leave*
Caiden (9:48:45 PM): -grips the washcloth in my hand, wringing itout- you're an asshole...-quietly-
Phoenix (9:56:31 PM): *shoulders sag* maybe i am....or maybe I’m just trying to save something that's broken
Caiden (9:57:07 PM): WE aren't broke!
Caiden (9:57:09 PM): n
Phoenix (10:00:57 PM): *turns to look at you, eyes sad* yeah...we are, Cai
Caiden (10:01:17 PM): NO, WE'RE NOT! I’m NOT HURTING BECAUSE OF YOU!
Caiden (10:02:31 PM): [empasis on the you]
Phoenix (10:03:55 PM): *sighs* well I’m hurting because of you..*steps over to the bed and grabs suitcase*
Caiden (10:13:56 PM): -wraps towel tighter around myself- so you're going to leave me here? alone?

Phoenix (12:24:29 AM): *bites at lip* if it's too much...you know you have Levi's place to stay at...i'm sorry, Cai...
Caiden (12:26:31 AM): no you're not...-crossing an arm across my stomach-
Phoenix (12:32:40 AM): *looks to you briefly* yes. i am...you have no idea how much...*hoists bag over my shoulder and heads out of the room*
Caiden (12:34:07 AM): don't leave... -voice sounding desperate-
Phoenix (12:37:11 AM): *clenches jaw, vowing to stay strong no matter how much it's killing me--takes a breath and simply walks out*
Caiden (12:39:16 AM): Phoenix! -stands there-
Phoenix (12:40:36 AM): *makes way to the front door and bites down on lip hard hearing you yell for me*

Caiden (1:01:23 AM): -stands there, a bit fidgety, hearing the front door open-
Phoenix (1:03:24 AM): *leaves and shuts the door behind me, going to car and not looking back*
Caiden (1:15:38 AM): -hears the door shut and my chest constricts- [ok I’m sooo horrible but why is it i see angelina doing something again. hey. maybe Caiden can kill her this time in self defense. that qould explain her death even better buahahah sorry]\
Phoenix (1:17:29 AM): (hahahaha actually...i like that!) *gets to car and sits there for a moment in tears, before driving away and trying to remain in control*
Caiden (1:22:27 AM): [because he left Caiden alonneee] -feels panicky all of a sudden, yay panic attack, and slides down against the wall, my hand shaking again-
Phoenix (1:26:03 AM): *gets to studio and collapses on a cot, clutching a pillow and letting it all go now*
Caiden (1:27:41 AM): -grips my fingers with my other hand, lowering my head to my knees and crying-
Phoenix (1:29:25 AM): *she watched the house for a long moment, seeing Phoenix drive away, and loading the gun, she made her way to the front door, knocking lightly*
Caiden (1:30:27 AM): [awww but like... i wanted to make them be a apart a few days... Caiden have his surgery and come home... maybe she notices Phoenix isnt around? i forgot to say all that]
Phoenix (1:33:03 AM): (sheesh...okay okay....scratch that then :-P) *buries face in the pillow and tries to remain calm, but can't stop thinking i've made a big mistake*
Caiden (1:34:02 AM): -skip a few days, eh? Caiden is home from the hospital after like 3 days of being there resting and whatever after surgery-
Phoenix (1:35:15 AM): *she sat outside the house. Phoenix hadn't been home in days. she had to laugh. well then, no one there to protect the little bitch. she walked up to the door calmly and knocked*
Caiden (1:40:48 AM): -doors locked, gonna have to break in or something... out back on the back porcn-
Caiden (1:40:51 AM): porch-
Phoenix (1:48:50 AM): *smirks when no one answers and knocks out the windowpane near the door, reaching in and unlocking it. steps inside and makes way towards a light at the back of the house--sees you outside and cocks gun* all alone, huh?
Caiden (1:49:21 AM): -startles a little bit and looks at her-

Phoenix (12:02:54 AM): *once the pancakes are all made, i take them to the table and set them in the middle, getting avery off the counter and sitting him in a chair*
Caiden (12:03:39 AM): -disappears back into the bedroom, curling up on top of the sheets-
Phoenix (12:07:26 AM): *sits with him, cutting up his pancakes and watches as he makes himself a sticky mess eating them*
Caiden (12:08:38 AM): -flips aimlessly through a magazine-
Phoenix (12:12:46 AM): *he leans over and gives me a sticky kiss on the cheek and i let out a chuckle*
Caiden (12:14:34 AM): -sighs, listening to you guys, and drops the newspaper on the floor, flicking on the radio-
Phoenix (12:29:38 AM): you better go wash up, little man *smirks*
Caiden (12:32:33 AM): -looks up at the ceiling-
Phoenix (12:36:36 AM): *he hops down from the chair and rushes to the bathroom, getting onto a step-stool and washing his face and hands, singing*
Caiden (12:37:53 AM): -curls up more into myself, burying my head in my arm-
Phoenix (12:40:19 AM): *he comes back out of the bathroom, beaming* i washed, daddy! what nowww?
Caiden (12:41:24 AM): -is going to stay here alll day-
Phoenix (12:45:06 AM): *comes out of the kitchen* now, we go shopping for you, little man
Caiden (12:45:31 AM): -neglected, sob. lol=
Phoenix (1:07:07 AM): can we bwing, Cai-Cai? *he asks excitedly*
Caiden (1:07:59 AM): -glances at the doorway and sighs-
Phoenix (1:15:20 AM): i don't know...you can go ask him...*bites lip as i watch you run to our bedroom* Cai-Cai, wanna come?
Caiden (1:16:19 AM): -sighs- no, avery... -lies- i dont feel well
Phoenix (1:19:54 AM): *he looks sad but nods, coming over and pecking your cheek* feel better *he ran back out the room and over to me, leaping in to my arms*
Caiden (1:21:12 AM): -sighs, whispering to myself- leave... leave...
Phoenix (1:23:18 AM): *grabs keys and carries him to the front door, shutting it behind us and locking it before going to the car, strapping him in and getting in myself--pulls out of the driveway and heads towards town*
Caiden (1:23:51 AM): -yeah um skip maybe0
Phoenix (1:25:48 AM): --hahah, oki ;-)--
Caiden (1:26:48 AM): -spent some time on the backporch and made something to eat before falling asleep in our room again-
Phoenix (1:28:01 AM): *brings avery home after a while, him asleep on my shoulder--takes him to the guest room and tucks him in before going to our room and flopping on the bed, closing my eyes*
Caiden (1:28:40 AM): -grumbles a little when the bed shifts-
Phoenix (1:31:51 AM): *lets out a sigh, curling up on my side and falls into a light sleep*
Caiden (1:33:34 AM): -moves onto my side, bumping into you-
Phoenix (1:38:14 AM): *lets out a sleepy noise and doesn't move*
Caiden (1:41:04 AM): -hand falls on your face0
Phoenix (1:42:40 AM): *scrunches up face and opens eyes slightly, swatting your hand away*
Caiden (1:42:52 AM): -groans and snuggles up against you-
Phoenix (1:43:20 AM): *furrows brow and just sighs, not pushing you away*
Caiden (1:43:32 AM): -hand on your face again-
Phoenix (1:46:43 AM): *crinkles up nose, swatting your hand down yet again*
Caiden (1:47:39 AM): hhmmmpph.
Phoenix (1:48:13 AM): stop smacking my face, nutter *mumbles*

Phoenix (8:14:37 PM): So...Phoenix not here to save you this time, hmm?
Caiden (8:15:35 PM): - a light clicking sound is heard and i lift my own gun up and point it at her-
Phoenix (8:33:59 PM): *chuckles* Oh you sweet little boy...who do you think will react quicker, hmm?
Caiden (8:34:57 PM): -snorts a little bit- what is it you want to say to me before i kill you?
Phoenix (8:35:52 PM): *raises a brow* Before you kill me? well isn't that smug of you...but i've already got my revenge...he left you
Caiden (8:36:43 PM): -holds the gun out a little further, finger on the trigger-
Phoenix (8:43:49 PM): *has gun already cocked and pointed at your stomach* come on...do us both a favor and just give up
Caiden (8:44:52 PM): -pulls the trigger without a flinch, its pointed at her head O:-)-
Caiden (8:48:25 PM): [unless we want to draw this out and make itmore dramatic?]
Phoenix (8:49:56 PM): (hahaha well, i'd say they've done the dramatic one already ;-) so...ding dong the evil witch is dead) *the gun falls from her hand with a clink, blood spurting and she collapses on the back patio*
Caiden (8:50:47 PM): -just stares for the longest time, dropping my own gun from my hand and just sitting there. its not long before police arrive, the neighbors having heard the shot, and their questioning me-
Caiden (8:51:28 PM): they're-
Phoenix (9:03:05 PM): (um...i have no clue what I’m supposed to do, lol)
Caiden (9:09:25 PM): [you can be the cops? i dunno? lmao]
Caiden (9:09:48 PM): [orrr...] -two hours later I’m in a holding cell and i get my one phone call, calling you-
Phoenix (9:14:49 PM): *stumbles off the cot, in the middle of sleeping, and picks up the phone* ello? *answers groggily*
Caiden (9:17:13 PM): I’m in jail. -voice quiet-
Caiden (9:21:27 PM): [pretend he said "in the nick" lmao... police station... it took me awhile to find the brit slang]
Phoenix (9:27:53 PM): *blinks a bit* jail?! what? why?
Caiden (9:30:52 PM): -feels my stomach sink a little- i can't... just come... i have to go
Phoenix (9:32:43 PM): *hears you hang up and rushes to get on clothes and shoes--grabs keys and races to the jail--coming in and asking where to find you*
Caiden (9:34:30 PM): [oo and what if avery was in the car in the driveway? :-O] -sits there as a guy brings you up outside of the cell-
Phoenix (10:14:15 PM): (oh man...O_O) *sighs and touches the bars, looking in at you*
Caiden (10:17:24 PM): -is sitting there in a tank top, which btw i was wearing and its cold outside, and the obvious bandages from the surgery still in place as i stare at the ground-
Phoenix (10:24:29 PM): Cai...*calls out softly*
Caiden (10:26:05 PM): -looks up, my features a mix between alarmed and confused-
Phoenix (10:31:34 PM): Cai....what happened?
Caiden (10:37:32 PM): i... -a guy steps up beside you in a suit- excuse me, sir, but Mr. James doesn't have to speak to anyone without his attorney...[which would be him]
Phoenix (10:38:06 PM): *quirks a brow* that's all fine and well, but I’m his husband, thank you very much
Caiden (10:38:55 PM): -he gives you the same look- that doesn't change the law, sir... if he doesn't want to talk to you, he doesn't have to
Caiden (10:39:08 PM): -opens mouth and closes it again, swallowing-
Phoenix (10:49:18 PM): don't patronize me, you arsehole... i know all about the law, thank you..and he doesn't have to talk to me, i wasn't forcing him to
Caiden (10:50:07 PM): i don't need a lawyer...-voice quiet and a bit mournful-
Caiden (10:54:24 PM): -the guy- look, i don't have to be your lawyer, kid... you can find someone else to get you out of killing someone. -he turns around to leave-
Phoenix (10:54:52 PM): *blinks a bit* w-what?
Caiden (10:55:31 PM): yeah, killing someone. murder. shot a girl right in the head.
Caiden (10:55:46 PM): [maybe the stations a bit mixed up too cuz she obviously was after him cuz she shot him before]
Phoenix (11:00:28 PM): *gulped and turned to look at you* she...came back?
Caiden (11:01:24 PM): no, Phoenix. i hunted her down. -voice sarcastic and bitter-
Phoenix (11:10:09 PM): *clenches jaw* and you shot her...*sighs*
Caiden (11:10:38 PM): what did you want me to do? you left me there alone.
Phoenix (11:22:27 PM): *runs hands through hair* no...i...im glad...i just...wow...*sinks to the floor, sitting there outside the cell*
Caiden (11:23:04 PM): -moves over to the bars and touchs them-=
Phoenix (11:32:11 PM): I’m sorry you're in here, Cai...*says softly, biting at lip and head in hands*
Caiden (11:33:58 PM): I’m not.
Phoenix (11:41:07 PM): *looks up at you, brows furrowed* you're...not?
Caiden (11:41:33 PM): no... because she deserved it...
Phoenix (12:03:06 AM): *nods* yeah...i guess i agree on that one
Caiden (12:04:31 AM): she did it because of you... -quietly- she did it because she figured she could do anything to me without you
Phoenix (12:07:01 AM): *furrows brows* what do you mean...?
Caiden (12:08:01 AM): because you weren't there! it was one of the only fucking things she said to me! she said you left me!
Caiden (12:08:08 AM): and you fucking did!
Phoenix (12:10:34 AM): *closes eyes for a moment and looks away* yeah...i did leave...
Caiden (12:11:08 AM): yeah, you did. -walks away from the bars-
Phoenix (12:18:46 AM): *hangs head and clasps and unclaps hands--staring at feet until i hear a man talk about the woman's son...and i freeze up*
Caiden (12:21:59 AM): better go claim your son. -quietly-
Phoenix (12:27:43 AM): *looks to you and grits teeth* yeah, i should *gets to feet and goes over, talking to one of the bobbies*
Caiden (12:28:20 AM): -rubs at eyes, letting out a harsh breath when youre far enough away-
Phoenix (12:34:08 AM): *after a long conversation and them looking up paternity records, one of them goes to get Avery*
Caiden (12:34:39 AM): -lays down on the roughg blanket facing the wall, tears soaking into the pillow-
Phoenix (12:41:43 AM): *he comes out with a female officer, looking scared--then sees me and eyes light with recognition* daddy! *he yanks away from the officer and runs at me, arms wide--i scoop him up, blinking back tears*
Caiden (12:42:21 AM): -hears nothing, whimpering-
Phoenix (12:47:37 AM): *bounces him a bit in my arms, holding him tightly and telling him it's okay*
Caiden (12:48:31 AM): -is going to be in like "great, now i have to share my husband" mode for the next few weeks because he totally wasn't expecting something like that to come out, and feels self crying at the thought, selfishly-
Phoenix (12:55:55 AM): *asks the officer if i can bail you out because it was self-defense, especially after the incident with her before*
Caiden (12:56:43 AM): -waits to be let out-
Phoenix (1:00:20 AM): *stands there off to the side, Avery's face pressed into my neck*
Caiden (1:00:48 AM): -they let me out and i practically slink out of the cell, my hands dug into my pockets-
Phoenix (1:06:12 AM): *waits for you at the door, swallowing a bit*
Caiden (1:06:55 AM): -doesnt look at you, staring at the ground and opening the door-
Phoenix (1:10:16 AM): *heads out after you slowly, going to car and unlocking the doors--settles avery into the backseat and gets in the driver's side*
Caiden (1:11:54 AM): -looks at you for a moment and then the backseat, shoving the seat back a little and getting in-
Phoenix (1:13:42 AM): *starts the car and heads back to the house*
Caiden (1:15:30 AM): -forces self to look at the road, keeping my mouth shut-
Phoenix (1:17:15 AM): *avery hums to himself in the backseat, talking in a little voice tinged with an accent about toys and all kinds of things--i sigh and answer him when he asks things*
Caiden (1:17:59 AM): -growing increasingly irritated-
Phoenix (1:20:53 AM): *comes up to the house and parks--avery asking if this was his new house* yes...it is...*gets out and goes to get him from the backseat*
Caiden (1:21:14 AM): -clenchs jaw a little bit and digs my own keys out, opening the door with a small slam-
Phoenix (1:25:27 AM): *shakes head a little and grabs avery, going to pick him up but he wriggles away from me, running up the walkway to the house*
Caiden (1:27:30 AM): -throws the keys on the table and they go sliding off onto the floor-
Phoenix (1:30:08 AM): *avery comes into the house, goes and grabs the keys and jingles them* Cai-Cai, wost your keys
Caiden (1:30:38 AM): -stops, my features scrunched up a little an just stares at him-
Phoenix (1:31:42 AM): *he looks up at you, amber eyes wide and holds up the keys in his chubby little fist*
Caiden (1:32:02 AM): thanks. -just barely, taking them from him-
Phoenix (1:34:33 AM): welcome, Cai-Cai *he runs off down the hall*
Caiden (1:34:59 AM): -watchs him go, bringing a hand up to my forehead and just standing there-
Phoenix (1:35:51 AM): *comes into the house finally, bringing in a few bags that the officers had given me with his things, shutting the door behind me*
Caiden (1:36:18 AM): -still just stands there-
Phoenix (1:40:49 AM): *glances at you for a moment, biting lip, and then heads to the guest room to put avery's stuff in there--in the mean time he comes zipping out, holding bagheera* you have kitty
Caiden (1:41:42 AM): -chews on my bottom lip and lets my hand fall at my side-
Phoenix (1:43:35 AM): *he smiles wide and goes to the couch, cuddling bag in his arms* pwetty kitty
Caiden (1:44:46 AM): -moves to find you, stepping into your room- doesnt it even bother you that theres blood all over our backporch and you just brought this kid home to it?
Phoenix (1:49:28 AM): where was i supposed to take him? if i didn't claim him they'd have put him in an orphanage...fuck that, Caiden...i'll clean up the mess, all right?
Caiden (1:51:17 AM): right, have fun then. -leaves the room-
Phoenix (1:54:47 AM): *tense and frustrated, goes outside with cleaning supplies, stomach twisting as i scrub the dried blood and gore*
Caiden (1:55:47 AM): [ewwwwwwwww] -sits down in the bedroom on the bed, curling up onnit-
Phoenix (2:01:30 AM): *scrubs until it's gone and the water is tinged red--gets up and goes to dump the bucket out, then heads to the shower, scrubbing self--avery comes to the bedroom door and goes over to you, crawling up on the bed and touching your hair* is Cai-Cai sad?
Caiden (2:03:05 AM): -laughs a little, turning my head and looking at him- how can you tell?
Phoenix (2:06:19 AM): *he pats your hair softly* cuz you look at daddy with tears...wight there...*points at your eyes and then wipes at some tears in the corners there* no cwy, Cai-Cai...*he wraps his little arms around you as much as he can*
Caiden (2:07:37 AM): -manages to hug him back just a little, feeling out of place-
Phoenix (2:10:48 AM): *he pulls away and his eyes widen* i know! *he runs out of the room and goes to one of his bags in his room--bringing back a little package of reese cups--crawls back up and sets them in front of you* they my favowite. but i share with you *he beamed proudly*
Caiden (2:12:43 AM): -smiles very faintly- i'll save these for later...-quietly, isnt hungry right now- thank you, avery...
Phoenix (2:14:45 AM): *he leaned over and pecked your cheek* night, Cai-Cai *disappearing from the room again, he went to put on his pajamas*
Caiden (2:16:12 AM): -sighs, looking at the door, and slides beneath the covers-
Phoenix (2:19:03 AM): *gets out of shower and comes to bedroom, getting on night clothes--checks on avery who's already curled up with bagheera in his bed*
Caiden (2:21:47 AM): -falls asleep holding onto your pillow, the stack of reese's on the nightstand-
Phoenix (2:23:13 AM): *comes into the bedroom, going to my side and getting in, curling up and pulling blanket over me*
Caiden (2:24:02 AM): -sighs a little as i feel the bed shift-
Phoenix (2:25:54 AM): *turns to the wall and stares at it for a long moment, trying to fall asleep*
Caiden (2:26:30 AM): are you going to talk to me... -quietly-
Phoenix (2:30:11 AM): *blinks a bit and looks over at you* i thought you were asleep
Caiden (2:31:24 AM): i was...
Phoenix (2:34:10 AM): okay...and now you're not...so...?
Caiden (2:35:33 AM): so are you going to ignore this all?

Phoenix (4:15:05 PM): ignore what, Caiden? what exactly am i supposed to say?
Caiden (4:16:01 PM): -swallows, shaking my head- i dont know, the fact we have a [how old is he again] __ year old kid in our house, now
Phoenix (4:18:20 PM): (4) *sighs* well....you did kill his mother, Caiden...where else was he supposed to go?
Caiden (4:19:15 PM): and you don't think any of this needs to be talked about? we'll just go around like it never happend?
Caiden (4:33:42 PM): and you don't think any of this needs to be talked about? we'll just go around like it never happend?
Caiden (4:37:53 PM): and you don't think any of this needs to be talked about? we'll just go around like it never happend?
Phoenix (4:38:18 PM): *sighs* what am i supposed to say, Caiden?
Caiden (4:39:31 PM): I DON'T KNOW! -standing up now- ANYTHING! SOMETHING! THAT KID IS SOMETHING WE CAN'T HANDLE RIGHT NOW! WE CAN'T EVEN HANDLE EACH OTHER!
Phoenix (4:44:39 PM): *clenches jaw and stares at you evenly* he's my responsibility, Caiden...sorry, I’m not a father that abandons his kid. whether we can handle him or not, he's here!
Caiden (4:45:39 PM): AND YOU TELL ME YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY? HOW ABOUT SOMETHING ABOUT HOW I HAVE TO GO TO COURT FOR THIS BULLSHIT! HOW YOU'VE BEEN GONE OVER A WEEK?
Caiden (4:48:57 PM): how can you be sitting there when my minds going a million miles and be so QUIET?
Caiden (4:58:09 PM): AND YOU TELL ME YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY? HOW ABOUT SOMETHING ABOUT HOW I HAVE TO GO TO COURT FOR THIS BULLSHIT! HOW YOU'VE BEEN GONE OVER A WEEK?
Caiden (4:48:57 PM): how can you be sitting there when my minds going a million miles and be so QUIET?
Phoenix (5:05:35 PM): YOU KILLED HER, CAIDEN! YOU not me! I can't do anything about you having to go to court! And yeah...I was gone, because I needed to be away! THIS HAPPENED! We can't change it!
Caiden (5:11:38 PM): -throws the pillow at you and leaves te room-
Phoenix (5:13:13 PM): *grumbles under my breath and goes into the bathroom, slamming the door-- in the guest room, avery had awakened and was dragging one of his bags out into the hallway, his teddy bear in his other hand*
Caiden (5:14:03 PM): -swallows a little, stopping midhallway-
Phoenix (5:19:40 PM): *he had a determined expression on his little face as he pulled the bag by its string out towards the livingroom*
Caiden (5:20:01 PM): -furrows brows a little bit and follows him-
Caiden (5:23:02 PM): Avery? -quietly-
Phoenix (5:29:05 PM): *he stopped in the livingroom, letting out a sniffle and looked up at you* why you hate me, Cai-Cai? I don' hate you...*he sniffed again and started to drag the bag to the front door*
Caiden (5:40:52 PM): hey... i dont hate you... -sits down on the couch- come here...-quietly-
Phoenix (5:44:24 PM): *his lower lip trembled and he looked at you warily*
Caiden (5:48:49 PM): -clasps hands in my lap and sighs- i dont hate you, love... -softly-
Phoenix (5:49:40 PM): but you hated my mummy...*frowns* i didn't like her either..
Caiden (5:52:41 PM): you're not your mum...-chews side of my lip-
Phoenix (5:59:58 PM): no...im not. my mummy's dead *he said softly*
Caiden (6:08:03 PM): i-i know... -feeling tears prickling in my eyes-
Phoenix (6:10:34 PM): *he looked up* you made her go away...she was bad
Caiden (6:10:56 PM): -swallows- i...... yes...
Phoenix (6:14:13 PM): *his eyes sparkled with tears* fank you
Caiden (6:14:59 PM): -swallows thickly, not sure what to say because although i agree with him, this feels demented-
Phoenix (6:18:22 PM): *he reaches up and starts trying to undo the lock*
Caiden (6:18:55 PM): avery... don't... come here...-voice still quiet-
Phoenix (6:20:46 PM): no. you said you don' want me here.
Caiden (6:21:24 PM): i...thats not what i meant... [cuz he totally didnt say that]
Phoenix (6:23:05 PM): (yeah i know that. but he's four and from what he heard, that's what he thinks...so :-P) you and daddy fight too much. i go
Caiden (6:24:03 PM): i don't want you to go, avery... -looks at him-
Phoenix (6:28:14 PM): *sniffling more, tears fell over his cheeks* yes you do
Caiden (6:29:54 PM): -finally stands up, moving over to the door and stepping in front of it, kneeling down- no, i don't
Phoenix (6:35:24 PM): *he looks up at you and tears stream down his cheeks* i don' wanna be an orphan
Caiden (6:37:07 PM): you won't be... i promise..-quietly-
Phoenix (6:40:22 PM): *he reaches up and wipes at his cheeks, clutching his teddy bear tightly*
Caiden (6:43:22 PM): whats your teddy bears name..-softly-
Phoenix (6:43:58 PM): *he stares at you for a moment then whispers* i named him after daddy
Caiden (6:44:57 PM): [does Nix hear any of this? o.o] -smiles a little at that- i think thats a perfect name
Phoenix (6:48:26 PM): (hahaha from the bathroom down the hall? lol) *he nodded a little bit and pressed the bear to his cheek*
Caiden (6:49:47 PM): [well i dunno maybe hed of come out by now? lol]
Caiden (6:50:33 PM): do you and Phoenix bear want to watch a movie with me..-.softly-
Phoenix (6:52:53 PM): (hehehe maybe maybe....or maybe during the movie he sees them ;-)) *he pressed his lips to the bear's ear for a moment and then nodded*
Caiden (6:54:57 PM): -smiles alittle and offers a hand-
Phoenix (6:55:55 PM): *he reaches out and takes it cautiously, fingers wrapped around yours*
Caiden (6:59:09 PM): -stands up and leads him to the couch, smiling-
Phoenix (7:00:39 PM): *he crawls up onto the couch once you get there and curls up to a pillow*
Caiden (7:01:33 PM): -put in umm aladdin cuz i love it... and waits for it to start, sitting next to him-
Phoenix (7:13:27 PM): *he watches intently, the little bear clutched tightly in his arms--i come out of the bathroom after a long time, ready for round two, and am shocked to see the two of you on the couch together*
Caiden (7:13:49 PM): -doesnt notice you, sitting there curled up holding a throw pillow-
Phoenix (7:15:53 PM): *bites at lip, then sighs and goes over to a chair, sitting there and glancing from you two, to the screen*
Caiden (7:17:16 PM): -is still not happy with you, not looking at you-
Phoenix (7:18:42 PM): *rolls eyes and stares at the screen--then raises a brow when avery moves closer to you*
Caiden (7:21:36 PM): -looks at him just a little bit- you like this movie? -asks him softly-
Phoenix (7:24:09 PM): *he nodded with a grin* if i had twee wishes...i want a doggie...a toy truck...and...a family. yep
Caiden (7:24:53 PM): we'll have to work on that toy truck, then...-quietly-
Phoenix (7:33:04 PM): *he blinked up at you* you have a doggie?
Caiden (7:34:11 PM): -nods- he's outside... do you want me to bring him in so you can meet him?
Phoenix (7:58:02 PM): *his eyes lit up* weally?
Caiden (7:59:35 PM): -nods- i'll be right back...-moves off the couch and pads towards the back of the house-
Phoenix (8:02:16 PM): *i smile softly and he grins over at me* you no tell me you had a doggie, daddy
Caiden (8:02:48 PM): -nox comes scampering in, and i pat the couch and he climbs up, coming over to avery- his names nox
Phoenix (8:04:30 PM): *he pats the dog's head, giggling as it licks his cheek* nice puppy
Caiden (8:04:55 PM): -smiles faintly- I’m going to go to bed, avery...-softly-
Phoenix (8:10:28 PM): *he looks at you and nods a little* night, Cai-Cai
Caiden (8:10:53 PM): gnight...-quietly, moving down the hallway=-
Phoenix (8:15:44 PM): *looks after you for a long moment but stays put, pulling legs up in front of me while avery cuddles up to nox*
Caiden (8:16:35 PM): -doesnt bother the the door, the last half of the movie sounding down the hallway as i curl up in the bed-
Phoenix (8:19:31 PM): *chews at nail, trying to get into the movie but it's no use*
Caiden (8:21:05 PM): -is still awake when the end credits start up-
Phoenix (8:25:21 PM): *avery has fallen asleep on the couch and i toss a blanket over him, turning off the tv and going to get a pillow from our bedroom*
Caiden (8:27:37 PM): -sighs, the only other pillow availible in my arms-
Phoenix (8:28:21 PM): *makes a face and takes an extra blanket off the bed*
Caiden (8:29:13 PM): -stares out the window into the backyard, the light on beside the bed-
Phoenix (8:33:29 PM): *bundles up the blanket and leaves the room again*
Caiden (8:34:40 PM): -closes eyes and sighs, biting back words-
Phoenix (8:35:30 PM): *goes out to the livingroom and curls up in the chair, pulling the blanket over me*
Caiden (8:36:39 PM): -wraps arms around myself, falling asleep hours later-
Phoenix (8:38:08 PM): *falls into a fitful sleep, unable to get comfortable*
Caiden (8:40:18 PM): -wakes up arounf 6am, slinking into the bathroom lazily and peeling off the bandages before stepping into the shower-
Phoenix (8:41:19 PM): *avery awakens and comes over to me, bouncing on me* dadddyyy! wake up! *he smacks my head*
Caiden (8:42:12 PM): [snortt!] -sighs, washing away dried blood around where the bandages where, grumbling-
Phoenix (8:44:14 PM): (heheh thought you'd like that ;-)) *startles awake and stares at him with narrowed eyes* wha? *he grins* I’m hungwy
Caiden (8:46:19 PM): -sighs, getting out and tugging boxers on before wobbling out into the kitchen and sitting at the table, not noticing anyones awake-
Phoenix (8:47:19 PM): okay okay...*gets up, scooping him into my arms and tossing him over my shoulders* what d'ya want? *he giggles and flails his arms and legs* pancakes!
Caiden (8:48:11 PM): -toys with the bandages, hair hanging in my eyes-
Phoenix (8:49:27 PM): *strides into the kitchen, seeing you there and doesn't say anything, holding onto avery as i pluck things out of the fridge and cupboards--when i turn he sees you and squeals* Cai-Cai!
Caiden (8:50:30 PM): -smiles just a little at him, looking down again, and clips the gazue-
Phoenix (8:51:37 PM): *sets him on the counter top and starts making up the batter* can we put chocwate chips in em, daddy? *i laugh and nod* sure, Av
Caiden (8:53:03 PM): -tugs the shirt on i brought with me, sipping a juice box from the fridge-
Phoenix (8:53:45 PM): *drops in chocolate chips and turns on the skillet on the stove top*
Caiden (8:55:16 PM): -watchs you quietly-
Phoenix (8:56:05 PM): *puts some batter in the skillet and starts flipping pancakes--avery steals a chocolate chip and holds it out to you, smiling wide*
Caiden (8:56:39 PM): -blinks a little bit and looks at him, saying a small thanks-
Phoenix (8:57:41 PM): *he giggles again and gets batter on his hand, smearing it on my cheek* daddy messy!
Caiden (8:58:21 PM): -snorts a little and moves to go back down the hallway-
Phoenix (8:58:58 PM): *wipes at cheek with a towel and shakes head at him a little, scooping pancakes out of the skillet and putting them on a plate*
Caiden (8:59:32 PM): -cleans up the bathroom without another word, throwing the old bandages into the trash

Phoenix (11:01:41 PM): *frowns slightly* you are safe, Cai...you are...*strokes up and down your back*
Caiden (11:06:59 PM): i wasnt... -whispers-
Phoenix (11:13:49 PM): *sighs* no...no you weren't...*shoulders sag*
Caiden (11:15:47 PM): -clings to you tighter, crying-
Phoenix (11:18:42 PM): *hands grip at your shoulders, pulling you as close to me as possible and pressing lips to your forehead*
Caiden (11:32:45 PM): i love you...-whispers, breathing in hard-
Phoenix (11:33:32 PM): *closes eyes against own tears* oh Cai..i love you too
Caiden (11:35:35 PM): i... i wanted to... i knew she'd come back... and i waited... i just waited...
Phoenix (11:44:05 PM): *opens eyes again and looks down at you, biting at lip* well...she's gone now
Caiden (11:45:39 PM): i know... -quietly-
Phoenix (11:48:29 PM): *squeezes you tightly* there's nothing out to get us anymore, Cai
Caiden (11:53:27 PM): i-i know... i just... -shakes head-
Phoenix (12:00:47 AM): *lifts your chin and looks into your eyes* what?
Caiden (12:01:17 AM): i dont know...-cries out softly-
Phoenix (12:08:49 AM): *sighs and goes back to holding you, not saying anything*
Caiden (12:09:14 AM): -slides my arm up over your shoulder, nudging my lips against your throat-
Phoenix (12:15:07 AM): *tilts head back a little, having to stifle a moan at the contact i haven't had with you in too damn long, even the slightest touch driving me insane*
Caiden (12:20:08 AM): I’m sorry....-softly-
Phoenix (12:24:26 AM): please...stop saying you're sorry
Caiden (12:26:08 AM): i dont know what else to say... -voice riddled with a confusion-
Phoenix (12:32:51 AM): *touches your cheek* just stop apologizing, Caiden
Caiden (12:45:03 AM): -nods silently, looking up at you-
Phoenix